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FinalHours Asked June 2021

How long can active dying be sustained?

My father is in what the hospice calls the "active dying" phase. Pulse ox is 50%, BP 60/40, pulse 70s. The one thing the hospice won't say is the timeline other than 'soon'. He's been like this the past 12 hours, not conscious and very shallow Cheyne-Stokes breaths. How long can this go on? Theoretically with sats this low, his organs can't sustain it for long right? No blue extremities or anything though, so it's all very confusing. Obviously everyone's different, but for those who have gone through this process, how long did it take until the end?

notgoodenough Jun 2021
My mom lasted 4 days, with her being in and out of consciousness for the first 2. She never got to the blue extremities phase, which I was kind of surprised about, considering she had CHF.
Hospice didn't give me any time frame until the morning right before she died. Her nurse came to check on her, and told me she thought mom would be gone "within 24 hours", and she was right.
I am so sorry about what you're going through, many of us here know the agony of emotions you're experiencing. You'll all be in my prayers.

ArtistDaughter Jun 2021
My brother was actively dying for 5 days, but he was not calm. He yelled. It was awful, but they assured me he was not in pain. No one in my family has ever gone "gentle into that goodnight". They tend to "rage, rage against the dying of the light". Sorry, that was the poem I kept repeating in my head as my brother died and I tried to calm him with more soothing words than Dylan used for the process. Eventually he did calm down and breathe slowly. We want to help. Just be there.
polarbear Jun 2021
Oh my! It must be awful watching your brother yell and rage in his final days.

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funkygrandma59 Jun 2021
Like most of these folks have stated, everyone's dying process is different. My husbands dying process took 6 weeks, with him not eating for 41 days and no drinks for about 25 days. It was a hard 6 weeks for me to endure, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
Hospice is not God,(as only He knows the day and time that He will call your father home) so all they can tell you is that perhaps it's soon. And it does sound to me that it shouldn't be too much longer. Just make sure that you've said all you've wanted to to your father, as hearing is the last sense to go. God bless you during this difficult time.

Midkid58 Jun 2021
When daddy got to this point, he passed within 2-3 days. Watch for purpling of the extremities. Long periods between breaths, then a sudden gasp for air.

Keep it peaceful and quiet and let them transition to the next world in peace.

DJE Jun 2021
4 days for my mother that died from Alzheimer’s.....but Hospice was a little shocked it took that long. I heard it’s about 2 - 3 days.

AlvaDeer Jun 2021
Hospice is your best guide here. Ask them why they cannot be more specific and they will tell you. It is difficult to gauge these things and even professionals are making guesses. Patients can compensate around a bunch of very low numbers in a surprising way. And each patient is as absolutely individual as his or her own fingerprint. I wish you luck and am so happy you have hospice.

NeedHelpWithMom Jun 2021
No one can really answer this. My brother and mom were in this state before dying in a hospice house. It can be a few hours, a few days or a few weeks.

polarbear Jun 2021
It could go on for a couple of weeks as in the case of my uncle. He stopped liquid and food intake for almost 2 weeks before he passed and not before his sister came to see him, and 15 minutes after she left, he departed.

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