Mom is 94 with congestive heart failure and advancing dementia. We want to move her to palliative care so to provide her comfort and provide us with a sense of security in her safety. She has started to refuse her medications believing they are "tainted". Without her meds we know she will decline. Has anyone been in this position?
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I agree with Alva that hospice is the better choice at this point, and don't hassle her about the meds.
My mom’s doctor suggested palliative care in the beginning of her decline. All this really means is that your mom won’t be as proactive regarding her medical condition. For instance, no surgeries would be done, no treatment of cancer, etc.
Hospice care is a better option in my opinion. My mom recently died in a hospice house house. She received excellent 24/7 care. She was initially kept on her Parkinson’s meds. She was also given anxiety and pain meds. At the end, her Parkinson’s meds were dropped. Hospice care is comfort care. You will have the advantage of a very knowledgeable nursing staff that are fairly accurate in determining what is needed at the time. There will also be a caregiver staff, social worker and clergy to assist the patient and their family. I am very grateful that my mom received care from a truly wonderful hospice organization.
I would advise to research all hospice organizations in your area. If possible, please choose one that has an ‘end of life’ house or facility. Check all stipulations for acceptance. Each hospice organization has their own set of regulations.
Wishing you and your family all the best.
But transitioning to palliative care is a good first step. And you do not even need to tell her if you don’t want to or if you think she would be upset.
If you look under level of care you will see that some only provide one basic level while others provide several levels. If you choose one that only offers in home residential hospice for stable patients, ask what happens when the patients condition advances. Others offer multiple levels. They all identify as hospice.
https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/resources/hospice/levels-of-care
Here is a link that might help.
If your mom truly does not want to take her medications any longer and understands the consequences, then hospice may be a better option. Palliative care is "comfort care" but they would have to intervene if she stops breathing or her heart stops. Hospice care provides "comfort care" as well but will not intervene when clinical death occurs.
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