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cbaileyk Asked July 2021

Failing fast since I went to my Dr. What should I do?

I really feel like I need some help taking care of mom, the house, myself, working. I just found out I have copd and emphysema and after doing what I have to do not much energy to do chores etc. idk what to do?

Geaton777 Jul 2021
Good wisdom from those who have posted. I would only add that you make sure that both YOU and your mom have DPoAs in place, healthcare directives (Living Wills) and Last Wills. A 2-hr consult with an elder law attorney/estate planner will be an excellent investment, especially one who is familiar with Medicaid planning, since many hard-working and financially responsible people are now outliving their assets.

It will be important to know exactly what financial resources your mom has, as this will somewhat dictate where to look for either a facility or start with some in-home help. Care is expensive but being well-informed is your best strategy. Wishing much success in planning and peace in your daily life.

againx100 Jul 2021
Wow, your mom has a long list of issues, especially for 72. Yikes. I thought my 78 yo mom was winning the "old for her age" award but looks like your mom might be in the running too. Not an award we want to be trying to win.

I agree with others that it's time to place your mom. This is too much and your health is suffering. Don't wait until you get worse.

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JoAnn29 Jul 2021
You need to place your Mom. Your condition will only worsen if you continue trying to do what you do. If she has no money you can get Medicaid to pay for her care. Be aware, that her SS will go towards her care.

Daughterof1930 Jul 2021
Your mom has a long list of conditions, no wonder you’re exhausted. Please look into a place for her to get professional care, and look after your own health. This isn’t giving up on mom, it’s caregiving in a way that will allow you to oversee her care, doing less hours and hands on, and guarding your future. Wish you both the best with the changes ahead

NeedHelpWithMom Jul 2021
I am so sorry that you are in this situation. You realize that you can’t do everything that needs to be done, so you’re one step ahead of the game. Start looking at facilities nearby. Once you find a suitable place, you will be able to relax more and focus on your own needs.

funkygrandma59 Jul 2021
It's now time to make yourself a priority and start caring for you. If you don't, you will end up dying before your mom does.
With all of moms issues it's probably time to be looking into placing her in the appropriate facility, where she can get the 24/7 care she requires, and you can get your health issues addressed and taken care of. The added stress of all the care your mom requires only makes your health issues worse, so again, it's time to put you first. Best wishes.

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