My husband is diagnosed with Lewd Body dementia has been in a skilled nursing facility for 5 years. His guardian is his niece who is a doctor. She is very controlling and in the facility 3 times a day giving his meds and feeding him. She is allowed in his room during these times even with the current Covid-19 restrictions. The family ( myself wife of 58 years and daughter , grandchildren) make appointments to see him at 12:30 daily. Our visits are hindered as it is reported he is eating then the guardian helps him to bed therefore we are told he is sleeping. This is just one incident of many that she has blocked or attempted to block our visits. She has placed an order on chart that he is not to be taken from the facility except by her. She filed for a legal separation from me so that properties could be settled to pay an outstanding bill of 22000. Our court date is September 2 . Advice would be appreciated.
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Just curious and you don't have to answer. Why was a niece given guardianship over a spouse? Because she is a Doctor? And why is she so invested in his care? Were you not at the court hearing when she received guardianship. Its sad guardianship was given to a niece not a spouse who has over 50 yrs invested in a marriage.
I would ask for a different appt. Say its not working.
I would get a lawyer and have him plead your case. Legal separation means nothing. Its just a tempory thing. My State doesn't even have it anymore and hasn't for over 40 yrs. You need to make sure your share of the assets are protected. I don't think a guardian has a right to dissolve a marriage. Ask a lawyer if you should at least take half of the savings and checking now and put in your own accts. Just because niece is the guardian doesn't mean she knows all the legalities. You need to make sure you get what you are entitled to. You have to live.
1. Attorney selection:
a. County Bar Assn:
If you're not familiar with selecting attorneys in Poplar Bluff, MO, contact the county bar association for assistance on locating firms that handle not only probate as Igloo suggested, but also other aspects of estate planning, including especially guardianship and/or probate litigation.
One firm for which I worked handled all those aspects, but there was also a separate Litigation Department which could offer insights on problematic issues or legal maneuvers.
Did a quick search and as usual the returns offer less specific search criteria. I searched on "Poplar Bluff, MO guardianship litigation attorneys ":
Hits::
https://www.google.com/search?q=Poplar+Bluff%2C+MO+guardianship+litigation+attorneys&source=hp&ei=tpESYcCqAZaqtQaykJ3wCA&iflsig=AINFCbYAAAAAYRKfxov9_BU5mARyi-QZE5gZCe2-qpOc&oq=Poplar+Bluff%2C+MO+guardianship+litigation+attorneys&gs_lcp=Cgdnd3Mtd2l6EAMyBQghEKsCMgUIIRCrAjoICAAQgAQQsQM6DgguEIAEELEDEMcBENEDOg4ILhCABBCxAxDHARCjAjoLCAAQgAQQsQMQgwE6EQguEIAEELEDEIMBEMcBEKMCOgsILhCABBCxAxCTAjoRCC4QgAQQsQMQgwEQxwEQ0QM6EQguEIAEELEDEMcBEKMCEJMCOgsIABCABBCxAxDJAzoFCAAQkgM6CAguEIAEELEDOgsILhCABBDHARCvAToFCAAQgAQ6CAgAELEDEIMBOg4ILhCxAxCDARDHARCvAToFCC4QgAQ6EQguEIAEELEDEIMBEMcBEK8BOggIABCABBDJAzoGCAAQFhAeOgUIIRCgAToJCAAQyQMQFhAeOggIIRAWEB0QHjoHCCEQChCgAToFCCEQkgNQxQlY-WZgjmhoAnAAeAGAAesBiAHJJZIBBjQ0LjYuMpgBAKABAQ&sclient=gws-wiz&ved=0ahUKEwjA3f6-2abyAhUWVc0KHTJIB44Q4dUDCAk&uact=5#spf=1628607031500
2. State Bar:
MO State Bar and might offer guidance on locating a law firm handling guardianship litigation. If that's too narrow, ask about probate litigation firms.
3. Contacting a bar association would probably be a good choice. I checked out on the hits for guardianship attorneys; it's like the Angi type lists; firms are rated by clients. W/o going any further, I couldn't tell if attorneys rate other attorneys. That's a better option.
4. Another possibly more specific, but not necessarily as likely option, is to ask the local circuit or appellate level MO courts for the code numbers or letters for guardianship, or probate, litigation. The code letters specify the type of litigation, e.g., in Michigan, GC used to stand for General Civil. I don't know what the other codes are; it's been too long to remember.
5. Legal journals:
Another, but time consuming option, is to search online for Probate or Guardianship journals, then look for attorneys who've contributed articles on guardianship litigation.
Missouri Guardianship Journals hits:
https://www.google.com/search?q=Missouri+guardianship++journals&ei=N5ISYZvDNM2ttQaCy424DQ&oq=Missouri+guardianship++journals&gs_lcp=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&sclient=gws-wiz&ved=0ahUKEwjbuvP82abyAhXNVs0KHYJlA9cQ4dUDCA0&uact=5#spf=1628607679573
Even if the contributing attorneys aren't in your local area, they may be familiar with those who are.
5. Another thought:
You might want to raise the issue of a TRO (Temporary Restraining Order) against the current guardian to prevent her from what appears to be an overly controlling and possibly secretive behavior, and against the facility to address alteration of records by the doctor.
6. And yet another thought:
Do you have any way to determine if any of your husband's end of life documents have been changed since this woman took over? One of my thoughts was that she has eyes on his inheritance.
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THIS is NOT a DIY.
& you need an probate attys that does guardianships as a sub speciality AND that does litigation. They must do litigation. They will know how to challenge both her guardianships and the legal separation of yiur marriage. I’ll guess that they will ask for a forensics accountant review of all the guardians fees and expenses for past 2 years as well as an independent review of his care and care plan. If it’s been 5 years, I don’t think they can easily do full 5 forensics but past2 they can. Stacy is a poster on this site who does forensic work, she might have suggestions for you, I’ll PM her. Your atty will ask for this is my guess and for a continuance till health & forensics reports are done; and in the interim request from the judge a dependent Adminstration of her guardianship.
Really you need to find an atty ASAP.