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DonnaF777 Asked September 2021

Dementia patient has no one. No family, friends. No POA. He cannot pay bills, shop, do laundry, nothing. In own apt. Who can be in charge?

He lives in an apartment and doctors are trying to convince him he needs to go to a facility but he refuses. He has no family, no one to help him. He is so confused, unable to remember pretty much anything and is partially blind. I am CG with an agency. He buys stuff: has 3 walkers and a motorized chair for $200 that does NOT work at all. Never did. Looks like someone took a sledge hammer to it. People are clearly taking advantage of him. He cannot keep his apartment clean and just fired his housekeeper telling her that he now has someone that can do it... me. But... no... that is not possible. He keeps me running to the stores getting him groceries, clothes, shoes, prescriptions, etc. and I only am there 6 hours a week. She used to do the laundry and now I try to get that done with everything else he wants me to do for him. I helped him pay some of his bills but who knows what bills need to be paid and when? He does not. He needs to get to his appts. but he does not know when they are! He did not know who his primary doc was! I called the VA and found out, called that office and found out he has appt. in October. He did not know. But what OTHER things are NOT getting done that we don't know about? When a vet has no one who is POA... who can then act as one to help this man? I cannot do everything that he needs done. Thank YOU.

AlvaDeer Jan 2022
Sorry. OLD POST

Geaton777 Jan 2022
This post has a DNR (do not respond)

... it is way old with no response from the OP

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ConnieCaretaker Jan 2022
Court Appointed Conservator...........like Britney had, PLEASE REMOVE AS I RESPONDED TO AN OLD POSTING THAT WASN'T LOCKED.

GardenArtist Oct 2021
Nonstop, this post is about 1.5 months old.  The OP hasn't been back to offer insights on what may or may not have been accomplished.

Nonstop Oct 2021
Put him in your car and take him to the ER at the local VA and report possible UTI. They will assign a case manager to deal with the rest. He will get evicted or foreclosed tho unless you maintain contact with the case manager to deal with all that.

Also, I think what @Kelkel was trying to say is that if you don't want to leave him to be stuffed in an often 1-star (almost disbarred) public Skilled Nursing Facility somewhere to get bedsores and neglect, you could make a HUGE difference (really life/death) by helping him locate a proper facility somewhere with memory care. The County social services people can help you locate places, sort how much money he has coming in and the places themselves can do the heavy lifting. They might pay you a commission (placement fee) too, leading to your new career as a placement consultant. It's really not that hard.

Kelkel Sep 2021
Help him find a care home he feels comfortable in. If you follow all the other advice he will just be shoved just anywhere & will have no more control over his life & happiness. He deserves to be treated with integrity & respect for his feelings & security. You are so kind to care & go above & beyond as is. You’re his only chance for a good ending to his life story. I would compile a list of things he would enjoy-an enclosed courtyard maybe, no stairs or elevators probably, caring staff, nice sized room for his favorite belongings, activities he might participate in, etc. He’s relying on you & if you can take him to your some places that can care for him that he might enjoy, you could visit sometimes & he can feel secure without worries. Good luck 👍

Riley2166 Sep 2021
Contact the local Office on Aging and file a "complaint" about the serious need for help and that you can't do the impossible - he needs help. They will step in and investigate and start the legal process to get him help and possible placement. But you have to FIND THE RIGHT PERSON AND AGENCY TO TELL - This will start the process. Don't wait.

Clairesmum Sep 2021
If your agency employs a licensed nurse or social worker, that person is mandated to file an elder abuse/self neglect report once they know of the situation.
Ask your direct manager to file if there is no mandated reporter.
The identity of who made the report is never disclosed to the client.
You can also file a report on your own.
APS deals with a lot of self neglect/exploitation like this sad situation.
APS can help cut through VA hurdles to get him assessed and get medical problems treated, APS can go to court to ask a judge to temporarily appoint someone as guardian of his property/money (often an attorney who works with adult protective services on these sorts of cases) to cut off access to his funds until the situation is clear.
Good luck.

Taarna Sep 2021
Call the authorities. The legal system will place him temporarily until a legal guardian is appointed by the courts.

Beatty Sep 2021
If you concerned About your client, report to your Agency Supervisor.
If your are concerned about serious self neglect, report to Superviser & discuss reporting to APS.
If there is a medical emergency, report to EMS.

Stay within the scope of your role & summon more help for your client as needed. (It won't help him long term to blur your role).

Thank you for caring 😊❤️

JoAnn29 Sep 2021
I agree, call the Adult Protection Agency. They will evaluate hupis situation. The State can take over his care and contact the VA if he is entitled to anything.

I would not get anymore involved in what your job allows. You are enabling him. He needs to be placed for his safety.

Geaton777 Sep 2021
I think the VA will be a long wait for this gentleman…I would call APS. Or is it possible his confusion is due to a UTI? Maybe “someone” can take him to Urgent Care and from there maybe he goes to the hospital then to rehab then straight into a facility?
GardenArtist Sep 2021
I was thinking that perhaps his confusion was complicated by his frustration, sense of isolation, and perhaps panic, or even a UTI, and that once at the VA, he could be evaluated to see if there is something going on like that, as opposed to dementia.

I have a vague recollection of reading or hearing from one of my father's team that the VA could fast track some applications, especially someone of this gentleman's age.
GardenArtist Sep 2021
Since he's apparently a Vet and has already contacted them, I would call the VA again and ask to speak with the social worker assigned to his team.  If one hasn't been yet, explain the issue and your concern, emphasizing the immediate need to get assistance for him.  

I've never contacted the VA for assistance prior to my father being registered, so I'm not sure what may be required, but I think at this point that's still probably the best avenue to pursue.   The VA has probably addressed this kind of situation for others, and I'm sure would have procedures in place.

And there may be service related traumas affecting his confusion; the VA can identify these issues and determine appropriate courses of action.

Good luck, and thank you for being a caring person, especially for a Veteran.

cwillie Sep 2021
The man most likely needs a guardian appointed by the state - IMO your agency is failing in it's duty to report an elder who is at risk of abuse. (I'm not sure whether the report should go to APS or there is a different agency, but they should know)

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