How to help Mom in Memory Care Center deal with those who have severe dementia?

my opinion is that memory care probably is not appropriate for your mom. Assisted Living might be more suitable. She will feel safer and less apprehensive.

i would move her into a different situation as soon as possible before she gets hurt.

This environment will not help her in any way.

BetterB; Imho, notify the head of the MC stat in regard to this issue.

Juse have her stay close to Caregivers and tell her to be friendly with them even tho they are worse off then her they are only looking for friends too.

I would also contact Adult Protective Services for information and help to protect her. This should never be happening. They have to find a way to stop it.

OMG, what a terrible experience for your mother. Aren't memory care facilities only for patients with dementia? Don't they have different areas for residents of varying levels of dementia? Definitely speak to a social worker. Your mom should not have to live like that.

That is a job for the facility social worker

If other residents are grabbing her, the administration needs to be notified about this unwanted behavior.

Many folks with dementia also suffer from anxiety. Your mom might benefit from a low dose of anti-anxiety medication.

It's not easy my father in is a MC unit and most of the patients in there either don't talk and just look at you. My father is just starting with Dementia and It's very hard for him because of that but he has made friends with them after 5 months it all just takes time. I try to listen to them as I'm walking with my dad and he will say just keep going it's ok they will follow. I feel some are harmless and other can be nasty I have seen that as I was visiting.

Oh my! My mom needed a MC unit last year. She “woke up” from a severe dementia bout of Lewy Body and found herself with the same situation. She was moderately confused at worse. Most were non verbal, and a bit pushy. A man pushed his way into her room..he hit her hard..I had her moved to a different unit within an hour and we had a lock with a key installed on her door! That alleviated her fear. We were able to move her to a new facility 6 months later as she became clearer....an assisted living with mildly demented folks. Many appear very normal with some forgetfulness. This facility she loves! It has a unit for severely demented patients and mom does not see that at all. Activities are plentiful. As a retired clinical staff member of these facilities I recommend making some calls to “locked assisted living buildings” to see if there is a better choice for her. This is not easy. Getting a good fit is work and may be costly. Our new building is actually a thousand dollars less a month by the way..and seeing mom happy was worth the work..

A good memory care segregates their higher and lower functioning residents from one another. My mother's MC had a huge common room, and the lower functioning residents had their own activities with supervision and rooms at one end while the others had their own with more freedom to move about at the other. She originally started with the higher-functioning folks, then eventually moved to the lower-functioning ones.

You must be able to expect your mother to feel safe, so talk to the administration about how THEY will ensure that.

It’s scary 😟. I’d speak with the SW or Activities Director at the MC. They absolutely will know which residents are still relatively cognitive and social. They can move mom into thier tables for meals or group them more together for activities.

if you can, go for when a more hands on activity is scheduled…. like they r going to be doing something Halloween, Thanksgiving… ask Activities person if you can help her prep in advance so that you r there when residents start to come in. You’ll be able to see who’s who and where mom might fit in better. Absolutely seek out other residents family, I bet there some family that go real, real, REAL often. They will be more than happy to give you their opinion & down-low on the others. This way you can know if moms being semi accurate or not as to what’s happening between her & other residents.

Also let Activities know if your moms crafty or has certain skills. Even if it was years ago that mom was a Cub Scout den mom or did floral arranging.

She will learn how to navigate the others. Just as you learn when you start school or a new job.
I am sure one will latch on as a buddy.
the staff should also help if they truly see a problem.
Give her time.

My mom has been in MC for 9 months.

When she arrived, she was a bit confused by the residents with more advanced dementias.

She adapted, and now, if someone else gets too close, she sternly tells them to back away, or, just a loud, “NO!”

It all got easier for her to manage.

Best wishes.