Could my husband have Alzheimer's?

Thank you everyone! I think I am going to make him an appointment with our PCP and be there with him. I'm hoping it's something simple that can be easily treated.

I don't think your husband is exhibiting signs of dementia, and certainly not Alzheimer's. If he remembers he forgot the flashlight, he REMEMBERS! The fact that he remembers he forgot his wallet, and that he can describe in detail what he's done, tells me he REMEMBERS! The primary symptom of most dementias, Alzheimer's in particular, is short term memory loss. That doesn't seem to be the issue with him. To have dementia, one must also exhibit difficulty with day to day living. He's still holding a full time job and does side jobs. Do you have any insight on how he's doing at work? MCI may be possible, but, again, I go back to the fact that he remembers. His difficulty in keeping the thread of a conversation going is maddening to you, I'm sure, along with having to tolerate the details of everything he does, but until you get to the cause of his behavior, you won't know what you're dealing with. There may be many reasons for his behavior, some possibly treatable, some not. Does he have annual physicals? That would be the time to have him screened.

Yes. Call his PCP and tell them your concerns. Do it sooner, rather than than later. Also get a good elder care lawyer to begin DPOA papers now. Expect to pay $350/ hr... they usually will tell you a ballpark price...depending on how much work they will do.
My husb was just dx. This summer. We are both only 61.... I was seeing new strange language issues, new behaviors and we had so much conflict cause I kept expecting him to respond normally, so I kept pushing back, asking what was wrong w him...etc ..
Now I finally know he has the brain disease we all dread, like his mother and multiple aunts, grandfather...
Prayers for you as you start this journey.

This forum recommended these things and praise God we got it done just in time.

His behaviours are impacting your marriage. None of us here can diagnose him, but we can speak from our personal experiences.

What happens if you leave the conversations where he goes into minute detail? Or if you tell him you have no interest at all in hearing about picking up dog poop? How does he react?

Have you talked to your doctor about how these behaviours are impacting your quality of life?

It is possible
I would suggest that you make an appointment for him for an annual physical and when you do ask the doctor to do a MME (mini mental exam) You might have to get assertive in pushing for a referral (if you need one) to a neurologist or neuropsychologist for a more complete exam but that would be the next important step. If the doctor after doing the MME says we will compare this with the next one when he comes in again DON'T agree, push to see a specialist.
If your husband does not want to talk about this or gets upset send a message prior to the appointment using the Patient Portal (if there is not one set up you can set one up for him.)
The next thing you should do would be to set up an appointment with an Elder Care Attorney and get your "ducks in a row" with all the paperwork that will need to be done.
Then you need to rethink your reactions to the things your husband says and does. If this is a form of dementia this will NOT get better, will NOT get easier and you need to figure out what your plans are going to be. You will not be able to change him or what happens to him you can change yourself and your reactions to what he does.

I to was having issues with my husband starting at 53 his M.D. said it was depression and put him on depression meds without testing . I just kept showing up at the doctor appointments and giving him new information on what was happening. Finally he was sent to a psychiatrist and pretty much failed every test they put him through. He also was unable to keep a job , this is a man that was a VP of a major company. Know 8 years later is in a memory care facility . Talk to his doctor and please hope it is depression. , because Early Onset Alzheimers is a night mare.

I pretty much agree with @bundleofjoy. And these could be signs of the beginnings of a MCI - mild cognitive impairment - (flashlight, stopping mid sentence) which may or may not continue to worsen. Or it could be just age related issues.

When I first became suspicious of my mother, these were some of the signs: her handwriting had gotten smaller, she occasionally struggled with her satellite TV remote or to change the input on her TV in order to watch a DVD. These signs were tiny and not too alarming, but with her family history of Alzheimer’s, I was concerned. I convinced her to go get checked out for a potential vitamin B12 deficiency. But it was normal. I was lucky she cooperated with me and went to a neurologist for further workup.

Her diagnosis of dementia made her understandably angry. However, within a short time, she agreed to go on the prescribed Aricept and we were both delighted a few weeks later when she seemed somewhat better. They added Namenda the next year. And mom continued to live independently (with me quietly overseeing her affairs) for seven years!

Each individual’s journey looks different dependent upon which areas of the brain are being affected. There are a multitude of reversible conditions that can cause cognitive issues (such as a B12 deficiency) and there are medications that may cause issues, as well.

Recalling minute details about a job does not negate the possibility of cognitive issues. My mom continued to amaze us that she could subtract by 7s (part of the cognitive exam) well into her disease whereas she couldn’t remember that she’d had lunch 30 minutes earlier.

Does your husband get annual checkups? If so, perhaps you can discreetly reach out to the doctor’s office prior with your concerns. They could check for vitamin deficiencies and give him the basic cognitive screening. However, be aware that these exams are quite easy and a good score does not necessarily mean there aren’t some cognitive issues.

Good luck to both of you!

hug!
actually, i would say, it could be the start of dementia.

dementia sometimes has signs years before it really becomes obvious ---- and normally it's the wife/husband who notices.

it starts with memory lapses - and trying to deny it's happening.
most people are not embarrassed with making a few memory mistakes. but when it happens more often, the person (who's starting to have dementia) is often aware it's happening more often, and they're embarrassed to admit it's happening.

forgetting every single night the flashlight, is not normal.

frequently stopping mid-sentence, is also not normal. (if he hasn't done it all his life)

i have a LO, who noticed years before some signs (dementia) in another LO. in the end, it was correct.

-----unfortunately, even if it is dementia, there is not much to do against it. no cure. and medicine, can make it a lot worse. sometimes better to leave it alone (no medicine against dementia).

one can read about it, try to inform oneself what might happen in the next years.

at some point, the person might even admit, there is dementia involved. often there's anger if one mentions the possibility of dementia.

at some point, setting up POA (power of attorney) is a good idea, before things get worse.

hug! courage!! wishing you well!!

You sound frustrated. He is forgetful but with dementia he would not be able to explain in such great and precise detail.

Put on your earplugs, do something else, maybe marriage counseling?

None of that sounds like dementia. You two just have different ways of communicating.

He's also somewhat absent-minded. That, too, is not dementia.