So last week he complained that his car was being used as a community car. He and his wife haven’t driven in 4+ years. They have a 4 door sedan that is the right height to get them in and out. I’ve moved to scheduling medical transport for them (at about $100 a trip). I’ve used my personal vehicle hundreds of times over the past years to take them out….
When I asked my Father to help me understand, he told me I was ‘making a mountain out of a molehill’. He is controlling and narcissistic, and now barely speaks to me. Last year I spent the equivalent of 20 work weeks as their caretaker.
Their son, my husband, was an only child and passed away 3 years ago. There are no other relatives in the U.S.to help.
My Mother-In-Law is a sweet heart and tries to apologize for his actions….what to do?
3 Answers
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The rest becomes a case of you setting appropriate boundaries - you help on YOUR terms, for the amount of time YOU determine, and you NEVER, NEVER pay for something they should pay for themselves (I'd also ask for gas money and parking fees when you drive them)
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I hope you aren't paying that $100. Who needs medical transportation? I sense there is a cultural thing going on too. Do you work? How old are they? Maybe time to find resources in the area they can take advantage of. Like senior bussing thru the County Office of Aging. If they have money, they should be using it on their care. You are entitled to your life. Being their DIL does not make u obligated to them. What if u meet someone else?