Upset with myself because I lost it with my mom tonight. She's already forgotten all about it, though. I caught her picking all the chocolate chips out of the mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Other issues are that she is always "tetris-ing" the garbage in the garbage can. She cuts pills (worn fabric) off of clothes and they end up full of holes. All of her help is not helpful. She breaks or purposefully ruins (fixes?) a lot of my things. Just a few examples are breaking my coffee cup and hiding it in the bottom of the garbage can, flattening (ripping up the inside of) the microfiber sponge I use to wash dishes. It makes me nuts that she messes with the food, many items bought specifically for other family members, because she doesn't wash her hands. Never has. She's always had a selfish personality, everything's always about her, plus the OCD quirks, but amplified with the dementia component. Sometimes she says she's sorry, that she knew I wouldn't like it. It's as if she's a defiant child. Most of this of course is the disease, but seems the actions are directed at me specifically. On the positive side, she's no longer anxious/worried, unhappy, naggy, or obsessed with insignificant issues she never let go of in the past. Just ranting on this first post of mine. I'm usually patient and keep a sense of humor about it all. Anyone with similar OCD -type issues?
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Maybe find busy jobs for her. Things that may not matter to you. Sorting socks, folding towels, etc. - when she gets done, wait a day then undo them and let her start over.
If you're planning on keeping her living with you and are not considering placement in a care facility there will have to be many changes made to the home.
You will have to literally "baby-proof" your house. The refrigerator and all of the cabinets will have to have devices installed so she cannot get into them on her own. Everywhere in your house that has a door has to have a lock put on it so she cannot access any areas on her own unsupervised. Her own bedroom and closet also. If she's at home during the day and not in adult day care, the areas of the house she spends her days in have to be limited.
It could also help if her doctor prescribed some medication for her. That may help with the OCD.
I had an adult client years ago who had Downs Syndrome and lived with his family. He also had severe OCD. There had to be a lock on everything that had a door in that house. Otherwise God only knows what he would have gotten into. OCD can be very bad and many changes have to be made to a house.
Put things away that you don't want her to touch or pick at.
If you are doing the dishes why not give mom that task? At least her hands will get clean...
You say that she is no longer anxious but many of the OCD things you mention are signs that she is having some anxiety.
What could you find for her to do to keep those hands busy so she is not cutting up clothing? A basket of pilly socks? Magazines to cut up? Would she maybe make collages using different textures?