Daughter in law tired of hearing my mother in law brag about 2 of her children who do nothing to help while my husband and I have given up..

So what's the other child who lives in the same town done to deserve not being bragged about?

Claudia I hope you'll stick with AgingCare. Even from your brief introduction it looks as if you and your husband have got into a situation which is difficult - but reversible.

What are your Husband's thoughts on the matter?

That YOU must do all for MIL?

That it's time for the next stage & he is ready to plan & act?

Or somewhere inbetween.

If you haven't already, book the time for a heart to heart with him to find out.

Since your MIL is cognizant you, actually your husband should do this... very calmly and nicely explain to her that you can no longer care for both of them and that you are going to look for a house and you will be moving.
Begin your search for your new home. Could be the same town or wherever you choose.
Other siblings can step in and care for mom and dad.
If your MIL can not care for her husband with dementia by herself there are caregivers that can be hired or Memory Care facilities that will care for him,
If MIL needs help she can look into Assisted Living if that is her wish and if your husbands siblings have no desire to be full time caregivers for their parents.
But you and your husband are under no obligation to continue to care for either of them.

This is a common situation in my very humble opinion. Build your support group around yourself and husband. I hope it may change for you but get prepared to go it alone.

Cinderella?

Time to leave the ball?

Need more information.