Abusive Grandpa. What can we do?

Victor, who is Grandpa's Power of Attorney?

No one else would be paying Grandpa's NH bills. But if he needs Medicaid funding and owns a home, it will have a lien put on it that will need to be satisfied after he passes.

So are you saying that nobody wants grandpa to use his money to pay for his care?

Because his house and money for it are his and are to be used for his care.

If you are living with him, I would suggest moving out ASAP, as like others have said, it's his home so he can do and say what he wants.
However, you nor anyone else is obligated to stay living there and continue taking his abuse.
Also you nor any other family member is responsible for your grandpa's care, nor any costs associated with it. Only he is. And if he doesn't have enough money for it, he can apply for Medicaid.
So quit taking the abuse, and get the heck out of his house!!!

I am so sorry you are dealing with this. Grandpas are supposed to be loving and fun, that is what we all hope for anyways right? Unfortunately we can't all have that and he truly sounds like a very miserable human being and I totally agree with getting him into a hospital and having a psych eval done on him. If he needs the help they will help and they will direct you all in what to do next. Does he want to go into a nursing home or assisted living facility? If he has the financial means he will be paying for it anyways not you all. It is not your responsibility to pay for him there are other options out there if he cannot afford it himself. Defiantly call adult protective services, very god advice from Lizbitty, and they will help you and advice you. Hang in there and remember it is not all on you all, there is help out there.

Are you living with him. If so, its his house, his rules.

Does he have Dementia? Did he assign a POA. If there is a POA and it can be proven that he is incompetent the POA becomes in effect. Then the POA can place him. If he has money it will go for his care. If he requires Medicaid, his home is an exempt asset and your family will need to prove why they should be able to stay there. If Medicaid does not allow u to stay in the home, then it will need to be sold for his care. In any event, if Medicaid is paying for his care, his SS and any pension he receives goes to offset the cost of his care.

If Grandfather has the ability to care for himself or hire help, then your family has the ability to leave. If his care is such he cannot be alone, APS can be called and told your family is no longer able to care for him and he needs a forced placement.

In addition, it is Grandpa's funds that pay for his care, not yours.

You can call Adult Protective Services, but if he can show them that he can take care of himself and the home, they won’t do anything, because essentially he’s doing what he should be doing (looking after himself and his home).

If he CAN’T look after himself and he needs help and there’s no one to do it you can call 911 if he is a danger to himself or others. Since he lives alone, once at the hospital, explain the situation and ask for a psych consult. They will determine if he can discharge himself and go home.