Now where can my husband go if the 4th place doesn’t work out?

Sorry to hear about your husband. You must be worried sick. When my mom was in a nursing home she all of the sudden became very violent and out of control. They sent her to a psychiatric facility for 30 days. Turns out her behavior was being caused by the amount of meds the NH was g giving her and some of them were conflicting. Every time she would have a symptom, the NH would increase her medicine. At the psychiatric facility, they took her off all meds to clear her system, then gradually added them back one at a time with adjusted doses and completely removing some. The facility said that nearly 100% of the patients referred from NHs were referred due to over medication and they had to be detoxed. We were floored! When she returned to her NH she was much better but the stress made her decline faster.

Good luck with you husband.

Arrange for a neuropsychiatric evaluation by a GERIATRIC SPECIALIST in that field, TODAY. If there is a waiting list, ask if he can be seen on as an emergency case so that

His behavior issues need specific management, whether by medication, specifically trained staff, and/or alteration (temporary or permanent) of his physical environment.

The fact that he “knows” you is irrelevant at this point. Address his current behaviors, neurological psychiatric status, AND WAYS TO ADDRESS HIS INAPPROPRIATE SOCIALLY DEVIANT ACTIONS via his assessment.

You can’t address his problem(s) until you find out what they are and what’s causing them.

Lots of good luck with planning, understanding, and managing his future.

He COULD be moved to a lockdown type psych ward. There they have a smaller patient to CG ratio and they do work harder with psych meds to gain some sense of balance.

I wouldn't worry, at this point, about keeping him quite sedated. He cannot be allowed to punch, hit, abuse ANYONE, and all the patients have the same right to safety.

Has he been medicated yet? Somebody should be monitoring what he's getting.

Until he is seen by a neurological physician and on medication that can manage his behavior, this will continue.

He needs to be assessed by geriatric
psychologist … some dementia made much worse by the newer antipsychotic meds….like Lewy body
eith delusions hallucinations. He needs proper professional care.
seroquel worked well my husband.
all these changes making him worse . He’s very frightened confused and anxious and feels worse than anyone can imagine. By careful and honest with the new home and get him good geriatric neurologist asap.
he’s probably used to being in control is scared and trust me he doesn’t want to be like this .

He is clearly mentally ill, I see he has dementia but this is unusual behavior despite that. . I would try to get him in a psychiatric facility where they can hold him until a more permanent place with the ability to deal with him can be found.

I am so sorry, this must be so difficult.

He needs to be admitted to a geriatric inpatient psychiatric facility. The medical staff can work to get him onto the right combination of medications to calm his impulsive and violent tendencies. Once he is adjusted, he will be calmer and easier to handle, Social Services at the inpatient psychiatric facility can help you with his placement into a long term facility.

Update…. My husband was seen by a psychiatrist today. He recommended injections instead of pills because he is refusing them. I kept him home as long as I dared to. I am 77 and life is getting harder each day.

The doctor increased the dosage but it isn’t working out too well. I guess it is a trial and error for the meds. My son went to see him today and told me “Dad is really mad at everyone.” I spoke to the administrator and she told me he took off his wedding band and told her to keep it. On the advice of the charge nurse and administrator I will not be going to see him. For some reason I agitate him more. I am afraid for my own safety and I will not allow him to physically or mentally abuse me.

The facility he is in now is a cross between a memory care and mental health. The other three places were only for Alzheimer’s. I wanted to put him in psychiatric hospital but so far this new place is working out somewhat. My sons get upset and say “no ma you can’t put dad in a mental hospital”. If it comes down to that I will do what is best for him and others he might harm, However, each time the phone rings my stomach gets in a knot. I never know if it is the new place or not. Thank you all for you caring and sharing.

Nusing Homes are a Horrible place to live. They are all understaffed and don't do much for you.
Maybe you should allow husband to move back home.

He would be happier living out the remainder of his life at home.

Check with his Dr and Insurance and put him on Home Health.

He'll be able to get an Aide to come by to help him bathe if needed. He will also get a Nurse to come by.

If husband has been in the Military he could get up to 30 hrs a week Caregiver help.

Prayers

They can't just discharge him to the street, just do not allow them to discharge him to you. If he has to be made a ward of the state, so be it.