She's 88 and living with us (her name is on the deed with us) now...she helped buy the house. It's only been a few weeks since she moved in...I don't know how we're going to get through this...but we have to somehow.
You are in the beginnings on this one. How large is your home? You are going to need boundaries, and with a narcissist in the mix that is a big order. You should have done a written agreement and contract well before agreeing to do this, as you clearly will have been aware of your Mom and who she is before making this agreement. What agreements DID you make? What happens when Mom needs more care than you can provide? What happens to home and deed if Mom needs placement and care and medicaid comes into the picture? I am hoping you had good legal advice and agreements done before this move. If not, I would still go to see an attorney NOW to make sure things are well done, and i's dotted, t's crossed. Nextly you may need a family mediator or arbitration with Mom. You will need to consider your space in the home, how much private time you each can have, and etc. I can provide you with contact where to start looking for family arbitration if you need it; send me a private message and I will give you the sites to start with. Good luck. She is 88, but that could in our time, with your good care, mean a full decade coming of learning to live with one another. If you can all do that there could be lots of love during that time, and a very good outcome for you and hubby financially.
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How large is your home?
You are going to need boundaries, and with a narcissist in the mix that is a big order. You should have done a written agreement and contract well before agreeing to do this, as you clearly will have been aware of your Mom and who she is before making this agreement. What agreements DID you make? What happens when Mom needs more care than you can provide? What happens to home and deed if Mom needs placement and care and medicaid comes into the picture?
I am hoping you had good legal advice and agreements done before this move. If not, I would still go to see an attorney NOW to make sure things are well done, and i's dotted, t's crossed.
Nextly you may need a family mediator or arbitration with Mom. You will need to consider your space in the home, how much private time you each can have, and etc. I can provide you with contact where to start looking for family arbitration if you need it; send me a private message and I will give you the sites to start with.
Good luck. She is 88, but that could in our time, with your good care, mean a full decade coming of learning to live with one another. If you can all do that there could be lots of love during that time, and a very good outcome for you and hubby financially.
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