My mom had embolectomy with general anesthesia. Is there anything I can do to make her feel better?

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zeenna2002 Asked February 2022

My mom had embolectomy with general anesthesia. Is there anything I can do to make her feel better?

My 93 year mom had embolectomy with general anesthesia on January 20,2022. Surgery went well. She was discharged on January 22, 2022. Ever since her surgery, it has not been the same. She sleeps a lot. Does not eat much. Refuses her medications. Uncooperative in every way. Unable to walk. I am wondering if she is going to make it? Is there anything I can do to make her feel better? I shared all this with her doctor. He thinks that she should be put on hospice. I would like to make her better. Any suggestions are appreciated.

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score 0 · Answer 1

I did not say that I want to force my mom to anything. I just said how do I make her feel better. I am not barbaric. I am sympathetic trying to find a way to make her life better.

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score 1 · Answer 2

The goal of hospice is quality of life and comfort, both for the patient and for the family.

If she recovers, then she may "graduate" from hospice. Many do. Hospice is NOT euthanasia.

I cannot imagine ANY intervention with this woman at this point that would involve "forcing" her to eat, unless her EOL instructions including installing a feeding tube in these circumstances.

That wouldn't be my way, but others wish every possible intervention done.

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score 1 · Answer 3

Major surgery at the age of 93, with a life expectancy of may be a couple of years, seems like a wasted time and resources. Now, her life expectancy has been reduced to 6 months.

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score 4 · Answer 4

Sometimes there are no "good" choices.

My late MIL had an aortic aneurysm that was about to burst. She chose the surgery; survived it but had a stroke afterwards. It advanced her dementia and she decided to starve herself to death.

I don't think hospice is "washing your hands" of a patient.

It's the compassionate choice here. And most surgeons don't even acknowledge that it exists, in my experience.

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score 1 · Answer 5

SP, no one can force her to eat.

What meds she's on matters. If she's on blood thinners and will die without them, and if they can't be hidden in a preferred food, like ice cream, then yes, she'll die.

I wonder if she had a stroke during surgery that has made swallowing difficult? And advanced her dementia to the next stage?

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I just wanted OP to be clear about what hospice recommendation from doctor meant. Why did he bother with the surgery only for her mother to potentially die this way. It seems cruel and yes maybe without the surgery she would have died from a blood clot. But is this any better? The daughter if she can will have to try and rehab mom if she doesnt want to put her in hospice since doctor has washed his hands of the mother now.

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score 1 · Answer 6

Sometimes, it just takes time to get the effects of the anesthesia out of the body and the brain.

Hospice will provide an alternating air pressure mattress to prevent bed sores. They can provide an extra set of eyes on her mom and allow mom some respite from poking at prodding.

Mom's will to live will be the determining factor here.

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But if she refuses food they won't make her eat, right? And if she refuses her medications they won't make her take those either. So basically her not eating or taling her mefications could kill her before the time needed for anesthesia effects to wane could kill her by placing her in hospice.

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score 0 · Answer 7

Why did the doctor even do the surgery if this is his solution to what your mom is going through now? Did he tell you the anesthesia could make your mom's dementia worse? I don't understand these medical professionals who don't take into account quality of a person's life after surgery before they go all in on recommending surgery. I am sorry your mom is going through this and hope she is able to recover enough to start eating and walking again. It is emotionally painful to have a successful surgery only to have this happen.

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Because as a cognitively competent patient she chose the surgery. He could maybe have refused to do the surgery (and therefore played god) but she would have just gone to another surgeon. The bigger question may be didn't anyone tell her or the family about the possible lasting effects of the anesthesia? Or give them options for a different type? Also, at 93 yrs old the wheels are coming off the wagon on almost a daily basis, surgery or not. My mom is 92 (and a retired RN) and she knows that any anesthesia would be a risk she's not willing to take, that's why she didn't get a knee replacement 10 years ago even though she was "a really good candidate". No doctor can know with certainty what other post-op health issues will arise in someone 93-yrs old. Without a doubt it is a shame for the OP's mom to go through all that only to have this new problem.

(2)

score 2 · Answer 8

Zeena, your mom has dementia, yes?

General anesthesia is hard on the elderly brain. It's even harder on the elderly brain of a person with dementia.

In your shoes, I would bring in hospice to give her some extra care and comfort to see if she recovers over time.

The standard that I often hear regarding anesthesia is that for every hour you are under, it takes a month of recovery. It hasn't been a month yet.

Feed your mom what she will eat. If that's ice cream, slushies and mashed potatoes, so be it. Consult with her doctor about which meds are crucial. Ask if they can be given in liquid or patch form, or crushed into food.

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But hospice goal is not recovery, right? They are not going to try and get mom to eat or walk. So basically doctor is washing his hands of mom by saying she should go on hospice. I think he should bear some responsibility in coming up with a better solution since he did the surgery. But daughter will have to just keep trying to get mom to eat and walk if that is possible without mom flipping out on her.

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My mom had embolectomy with general anesthesia. Is there anything I can do to make her feel better?

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