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bingsy Asked March 2022

With a family of 4 siblings, should a husband assume most caregiver responsibility for his wife?

2 local siblings and 2 local siblings busy with their own lifestyles and expect husband's role for caregiving.


Husband needs to address his own medical issues and siblings focus on the wife's needs. (I remember mom).

Isthisrealyreal Mar 2022
Well, the spouse is responsible and not the siblings.

Professionals should be helping both husband and wife if they can't care for themselves and each other.

Can you clarify the situation?

gladimhere Mar 2022
????

Profile doesn't say anything either. I have no clue what the question is.

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Beatty Mar 2022
Bingsy, I'm not sure where you fit into the family.. ?

But the Wife's care needs have to balanced against the Husband/Caregiver's care burden.

Sounds like a bigger care team is needed.

Social contracts for who *should* do the caregiving aren't really helpful - unless everyone is the plan is upfront, honest & all agreed to change the plan as needed.

After an updated needs assessment, get honest feedback from family with their realistic help offers. Then services/paid home help come in to fill the gaps. If the gaps are very large, it may be time for a whole new plan.

JoAnn29 Mar 2022
Yes your post is confusing. Do you mean siblings as the children of this couple? Your the only child that helps?

Or do you mean your parents siblings.

If ur siblings than yes it would be nice if they pitched in especially if Dad has health problems. But they are not obligated to. It should be up to Dad to ask for help. If no one is willing to help, then may be time to place Mom if caring for her has become too much.

If your parents siblings, no they are not obligated to help. Both my brothers have their own SOs and children. Its up to their families to care for them.

freqflyer Mar 2022
bingsy, I couldn't quite understand your question. We need more information. Are you a 3rd sibling who is dealing with taking care of your wife? And you expect her siblings to come help your wife?

What is the age and health condition of the wife? Or are you talking about your or your spouse's mother? How old and the health condition of the husband you except to take care of his wife? Or is this husband your or your spouse's father?

More information would help clear up a lot of questions :)

lealonnie1 Mar 2022
Your question is quite choppy and doesn't make a lot of sense. You feel like the siblings should focus on mom's needs (I remember mom...? What does that mean?) and dad should focus on his own medical issues? Then you also say the '2 local siblings are busy with their own lifestyles and expect husband's role for caregiving'. What does that mean? That you expect your father to do the caregiving for your mother???

I think you need to clarify what your question is so you can get some lucid comments that are helpful.

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