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mommomj Asked March 2022

How do I get a friend's children to help me with their father?

That's all I'm going to say.

JoAnn29 Mar 2022
"need to talk to someone about my situation"

Sorry, this is a forum of Caregivers caring for LOs in some capacity. There is no "chat" here or professional to directly talk to. Just people who have probably shared the same circumstance your in. So, you need to give us some more background for us to offer solutions.

How old are u and he
How did you get involved in his care
What kind of care does he need

Grandma1954 Mar 2022
You can't
You can not "get" someone to do something they do not want to do.
And from a personal point of view I do not know if I would want someone caring for me that was being forced, coerced, bullied into caring for me.
What you can do is forget trying to get them to help their dad.
This gentleman should pay to have the caregivers that he needs to manage.
Once his funds are depleted then the application process for Medicaid can begin.
Before that though look for all the ways that he can get help from whatever resource is available.
Is he a Veteran? If so the VA may be of help. A copy of his DD214 and a call or trip to the Veterans Assistance Commission and he can find out what benefits he is entitled to.
Contact the Area Agency on Aging, request a needs assessment and there may be services that he would qualify for.

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lealonnie1 Mar 2022
You self-righteously DEMAND they help you with their father?

No?

If you are caring for a boyfriend who's children refuse to help you, and you took on this care willingly, then you're on your own, really. Children are not obligated to do hands on care for their parents and why would they, if YOU are doing it FOR them, may be their rationale here. But again, you're asking a loaded question in a snarky way, so you can't expect to get any real answers.

Rethink your question; rephrase it with more details and lay it all out there so you can get some REAL answers to what is obviously a dilemma you're facing!

AlvaDeer Mar 2022
You don't. That is pretty much full stop and end of sentence.

Becky04489 Mar 2022
They are not obligated to help. They could be refusing for many different
reasons. If they've shown no willingness to help, don't ask again.

againx100 Mar 2022
Have you asked them to help and they refuse? It's very common. So there is nothing you can do. You will have to find other ways to get help. Like hiring someone.

JoAnn29 Mar 2022
You have to give us more info. How did you become caregiver for a friend?

GardenArtist Mar 2022
Has it occurred to you that the children may not want you involved? That might occur if you're the father's girl or lady friend.

Beatty Mar 2022
How do you get people to help? You ask them.

They can choose to help. Or not.

If not, you widen the search. If no free help is offered, you pay for it.

polarbear Mar 2022
I don't know and that's all I'm going to say.

Nokonoko Mar 2022
You don't, unfortunately no one even children are obligated to care for an elderly parent.
lisatrevor Mar 2022
Not true. Depending on the state and the exact circumstances of parent and children, the children may be obligated.
MJ1929 Mar 2022
Beats me. You've given us absolutely nothing to work with, so good luck to you.

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