I am the Court-appointed Legal Guardian for my Mom. I am trying to find an affordable place in Queens, NY, that offers the special diet Mom needs. I contacted one of the free services to help with my search. I've checked them out and the ones in the area I'm searching have low sodium/low sugar diets, but not Mechanical Soft.
The nursing home costs have severely depleted my bank account. I'm paying out-of-pocket for Mom's care (she's been there since October 2020.) My opinion of the place has also diminished significantly. She doesn't like the food and seems to subsist on mainly sandwiches for lunch and dinner.
I've looked into Memory Care facilities and had to scratch them from my list. One didn't make accommodations for special diets. The other could take Mom right away and give her the soft diet. My finances made the latter impossible. Now I've looked at the information on the other Memory Care facilities and they do not mention mechanical soft diets.
Mom's nursing home is in the same neighborhood where I live. I plan to move to a neighborhood close to the Memory Care place where Mom is placed. I have been wanting out of my apt for a long time. It's also a co-op unit. From what I've read, none of them meet her dietary needs.
Does this mean that my Mom is condemned to spending the remainder of her life in a place she despises and I want her out of? Is this the "end of the line"? To compound the situation, my elder law attorney has to petition the Court to grant me permission to sell my apt. The lawyer also knows a Senior Placement professional. I am reluctant to involve them in this because I don't think she will tell me anything I don't already know. I used her service before to assess the most appropriate setting for my Mom's dementia care. It cost me $600 to find out Memory Care would be best. I am very despondent. I am an only child and I don't have any family to help me. I am emotionally exhausted and disgusted with the whole mess. Two lives are in limbo. It's like we're both prisoners. What can I do?
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I too wonder why you did not apply for Medicaid. You definitely need to now. MCs are private pay.
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Google also says “Soft food diet is one that includes foods that are easy to chew and swallow and excludes foods with a hard texture. Mechanical soft food diet refers to using equipment, such as a blender or processor”.
I think you need to ask the right question!
Swallowing impairments/difficulties are so common in the later stages of dementia that I would expect *any* memory care unit or facility offering dementia care to be able to cope with your mother's dietary needs. Our service certainly does comply with any specifications like that, such as thickened fluids or soft diets, and we're just providing domiciliary support in our clients' own homes.
I wouldn't rule out the ones that don't refer to it specifically in their brochures/online information - ring them up and ask them.
I'm sorry for what you're going through. Can't anyone at the Nursing Home help in the search?