Am I the only one who would like to have just one holiday off?

Not caring related .. but when I was working , and had a 3 day holiday , it made me cringe and irritated to have to celebrate with my husbands family….. so much work … for that day off … Last time We got together on July 4, at my house dear brother-in-law felt it necessary to show his disapproval for pizza and not burgers on the grill… He was pretty aggressive. Not only that the pizza place we’re going to get pizza from was closed. So what we had wasn’t good enough for him. That was it for me.

An interesting note: the woman who 'started' Mother's Day as a tribute to her beloved mother, saw it become a sad and depressing 'holiday' in just a few short years. For women who yearned to be mothers, it was awful. For women who had difficult kids, or were single and struggling to raise a family, it was awful, For women who adored their kids but were TIRED, it was awful--

Get my gist? One of the presidents declared it a national holiday and this woman spent the rest of her life trying to get it 'overturned".

BTW, EVERY Sunday is Father's Day. 'Nuff said.

Only after 40+ years of being a mom myself did I begin to lose the absolute hatred I had for Mother's Day. It was always about my MIL, always, and I was the rotten DIL. She never acknowledged me as a mother and made sure I had many hurtful barbs hurled my way.

We 'celebrate' in the most laid back fashion. My kids all are old enough to gift me beautiful gifts, but it's the personal notes and cards that I treasure.

I do not have any relationship with my MIL any more. I see MY mother the day or two before Mother's Day.

Can you hire someone to go take care of your parents a couple of hours a day? Mondays, Wednesday & Friday’s I have 3 hours to myself. I go to the pool & steam room. My mom is on new medication and hopefully this will help with her bathroom issues. Once that is under control she will be going to adult daycare 2 days a week to give me & my husband a break.

I don't have any day off, ever. But, my siblings have every single day off

It can be very difficult trying to make everyone happy.
So this year I went out of town with the hubs to see our son. We stayed in a nice hotel and had a nice dinner with him. For once it was a Mother's Day all about me.

I felt this with my whole soul. I moved my grandpa into assisted living earlier this year and Easter was the first holiday “without” him. I told my family we were not doing ANYTHING. If they wanted to host and do something that was fine, but I was having a break.

I did see my grandpa and brought the staff some treats, and wouldn’t you know none of my family hosted anything.

Its hard when everyone depends solely on you especially when you’re a caregiver.

I remember being so fed up that it always had to revolve around the needs of my father. How was he to get to and from my house for a holiday? Who was keeping an eye on him while he ate and who would bring him to the bathroom more times than I can count? It is impossible to host and cater to an elder. But we didn't have a big enough family that we could spread the chores around. And I felt terrible asking anyone to do anything. I remember one Christmas my son and I were crammed in the power room trying to help my father use the bathroom. Son had to hold and steady him while I got his pants down. No one should have to do that! After that episode, I seriously thought about not bringing my father to any future holiday gatherings. Covid made the decision for me. Holidays were no longer fun, they were just one big ball of stress for me.

At my Moms AL they covered all the basis. My Mom did not know one day from the other. The AL would have a dinner the weekend before Christmas. Family invited. I chose not to go because too many people for me. My brothers chose not to show up at all.

You are entitled to your Mothers Day. Too late now but you could have celebrated Moms yesterday. Telling her your taking Sunday for your Mothers Day. Christmas too. Celebrate theirs at the AL. Easter too. You have a family that is growing you deserve to be them. Tell your parents you are missing your grands best years.

Oh I love that KISS approach Lealonnie 😀

Back to basics: a phone call. Or cake & a card for birthdays. Flowers for other days.

After all, what do people really want? To have special days remembered.

Sometimes the pressure to put on the whole she-bang comes from.. ourselves! 🙃

If the Post-Covid Blues lurking with intent...
Rest up, re-engage with life at the pace you need. This is your defence strategy.

If you want a holiday off, then take it off. Make up an excuse for why you can't celebrate the day with your folks, and then don't look back. A good idea is to pick a different day to celebrate a holiday on rather than the actual day. And in your case with Mother's Day, you have the perfect reason why you can't make it: you're too tired and achy from just getting over Covid, and you just need to sleep. PERIOD. No room for arguments. If you want to bring over some food or a gift, fine. If not, pick another day to 'celebrate' and that's that.

We all make way too big a deal about these Hallmark Holidays anyway, in my opinion. Then our parents turn them into a federal case and force us to show a festive face, etc and it gets to be TOO MUCH after a while. KISS is my motto these days, Keep It Simple Sweetie.

Good luck doing things YOUR way this year and in the future!