If all meds are discontinued for Hospice, he will pass from untreated seizures and metastatic brain cancer. Due to his confusion, he believes he is in rehab for strengthening to return home. I would appreciate suggestions on explaining this transition to him.
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This I know firsthand, as my husband who had seizures shortly after having a massive stroke in 1996 and ended up under hospice care in our home for 22 months, from Dec. 2018 until his death in Sept. 2020. He was on 3 different high doses of seizure medications to keep them under control prior to going under hospice care, and they kept him on all of his medications(not just his seizure ones)until he was "actively" dying. But even then they supplied me with a liquid medication that I had to put in his picc line to keep his seizures under control, as he started having seizures a lot then.
The job of hospice is to keep a person as comfortable as possible so they can transition from this life to the next. They won't withhold a needed medication, but of course won't be treating his cancer in anyway other than to give him pain medication.
And even though my husband(who had vascular dementia)was under hospice care for the last 22 months of his life, I don't think he ever really understood that being under their care meant that he was dying. And of course I didn't mention it to him either, as I just wanted to be able to enjoy whatever time I had left with him.
Wishing you the very best on the road ahead.
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From your profile:
"Husband has dementia and cognitive issues related to brain cancer treatment. He is very self centered and does not appreciate that I am doing everything since he is in a wheelchair, can't drive, can't make sense."
Is there a reason that he has to know?
Would letting him think what he wants be a terrible thing?
If nothing is to be gained by him, choose other subjects.
If he requests PT, see if someone who helps care for him can do passive motion type movements (within the hospice framework).
Safety Peace Comfort.
I am so sorry you are going thru this.
I suggest you talk to the hospice social worker and ask for some assistance finding therapy for yourself. You've been through a lot as has he, and you do need a way to get some peace within yourself.
There is absolutely no reason to try to get him to understand the transition he's making. Try to find it in yourself to have compassion for him, and seek compassion for yourself elsewhere. (Also learn about what hospice does and does not do.)
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