I am the POA for my mother who has dementia. When my dad died in May, I became the primary caretaker.
Mom and Dad had joint accounts for just about everything. Their banks have given me access to funds, etc, and I can write checks and withdraw money from the accounts.
I like to discuss the finances with Mom, but she forgets what I've told her or she doesn't understand. I'm paying our bills now, and I make sure that she has everything she needs. It is what my dad wanted and worried about. I often ask her if she wants me to write a check for a particular something or if she prefers to do it. She has signed before, but she usually prefers that I sign.
Some weeks ago, I transferred a large amount of money from their money market funds to pay off my debts. At the time, I thought it was a good financial decision. I decided not to return to work for awhile, so I knew that I didn't need the stress of those bills. I discussed this with Mom, and she was fine with it as long as the funds are put back in at some point. I am selling my house, so the money will be deposited into that money market fund along with one of the checking accounts.
Has anyone done something similar as a POA? I spoke with an attorney about it, and he said that as long as it was all right with my mom, it should be fine. Now I worry about reporting this to the IRS, but the bank assured me that this was not necessary.
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But I have to caution you: at first reading, it looks *terrible.* You acquire POA on your father's passing, your mother's understanding of finances is patchy at best, and you transfer a large amount of money to pay off your personal debts? I've lost my emojis or I'd be putting The Scream one on here.
Was there any reason your bills couldn't wait until you'd sold your house? How long do you estimate it will take to do that?
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Be aware that Social Security only goes back 35 years at time u start collecting. If you are not collecting SS yet not working will effect the amount you will receive. Lets say you didn't plan on taking SS till 67 at 100%. You quit a job at 57 to care for Mom. Thats 10 yrs you have not worked. You have only worked 25 yrs in that 35 and that is what your SS will be based on, the 25 years which may not have been as productive as the 10 yrs you could have worked.
I was retired by the time my Mom needed care. But I see now that people under retirement age really need to look how caregiving f/t will effect them in the future. Cost of living rises constantly. I am sure that 1700 a month my Mom lived off of 9 yrs ago, would not sustain her now. I look back and now wish I had continued to work and collected my SS at 66 instead of 62.
I read long ago that when someone leaves a job, depending on the job, one would lose $350,000 over the years. This included not only the income, but perks offered by the company such as health insurance [which is costly], 401(k) contributions, stock options, education benefits, vacation pay, sick pay, of which it all adds up.
Curious if you spoke with an Elder Law Attorney?
What I would pay the caregivers is double the salary I made, but now I have no healthcare so I have an appt. next week for this. The funds will still be there for anything that my mom needs or wants. I'm looking for something that I can do from home so I will feel like I am contributing to the household more.
You should, however, document the loan so everything is spelled out. I doubt that Mom needs to sign, but you do.
It could be something as simple as
”I, ______, borrowed _____ from _____ on ______ and will repay it in a lump sum from the sale of my home at ______ by ____. No interest will be due unless not repaid within one year, in which case the interest rate will be _____.”
File the paper with Mom’s other assets just in case something happens to you and someone else needs to help Mom account for her funds.
Note that not all POA paperwork allows the agent to lend themselves the principal’s funds. Like being paid for POA work or caregiving, it is not necessarily unreasonable, but it should be transparent and within the principal’s best interests.
Or are you talking about your moms reporting it? She wouldn't have to report anything unless you are trying to do this as a gift. Which, I wouldn't do. You are a legal fiduciary as her POA and you can't take her money, it is a violation to enrich yourself from the principles assets and you could get into trouble.
I would give mom a promissory note and include minimal interest, in the event it ever comes into question you will be protected.
Her dementia is worse, but she does really well overall.
She was the beneficiary of Dad's estate, and I am her beneficiary. I have made preparations in case something happens to me before her.
I would be careful about using her money for a loan to you. It should be fine but if she ever needs Medicaid, it won't look good. Since you are going to repay once your house sells, seems like it'd be fine. I wonder if putting the exact amount back into the original account would make it easy to see the out and then the in showing easily that it was repaid.
Good luck