Does anyone have experience with a live-in caregiver?

The FLSA (Federal Labor Standards Act) is very strict on hiring live in caregivers. Some of the rules are:
1. Live-ins cannot own or rent another home.
2. Live-ins must work (be available) consecutive 24 hour shifts of no less than 5 days. In other words: Sun-Thu., Mon-Fri., etc. During their shifts the must be allowed a minimum hours of uninterrupted sleep (I believe it is 5), they must also have time off for meal breaks.
3. They must be paid at least the federal wage. Some states require rates above the federal rate. - But you can deduct rent. Additionally, live-ins are exempt from overtime pay, whereas standard, conventional employees/caregivers must be paid overtime after 40 hours.
I found that when all was considered finding conventional, 40-hour a week caregivers was the best way to go.
Another problem to consider is what happens if you get a live-in you don’t like and then the fed says you can’t kick out someone because of some new pandemic presidential executive order. I see a problematic situation with live-ins. More than one I’m willing to take a risk for.
PS. Whatever you do, conventional or live-in, RUN CRIMINAL BACKGROUND CHECKS. Find an independent agency for this. And do a 50-State search. I pay $117.00 every time I hire someone.

I had really good experiences with a live-in caregiver. It was interesting because she was Jamaican and had a network of friends and relatives who were also caregivers. She explained that in Jamaica old people were cared for and respected, and she had always wanted to be a caregiver. Never any stealing, and sometimes her family members stopped in and brought her Jamaican food. They never failed to bring a little gift for my parent - a flower, for instance, from their yard. Nothing expensive. Our caregiver’s stepmom was an RN and could be called anytime for informal advice. These were good people. Employed her and several other relief and assistant caregivers for 5 - 6 years. We paid them well. No agency involved.

You will likely need more than 2 or at least someone who can step in when needed if one quits/gets sick/fired/ or has some other emergency. We've had 24/7 aides for my mom since dad died in 2020 from COVID, brought into the house by a previous aide before there was a vax. Consider making vax/masking a requirement if that concerns you. The local agency we use does not and several of the aides had it go through their unvaxxed/'you're not the boss of me" families My mom's had COVID 3x in total from aides. One of the reasons we're moving toward a nursing home. The other is lack of training/thefts/Meth Girl and the "quality" of most of the aides. As others are saying keep an eye on things. My sister lives nearby and I travel to my mom's Sunday to do that.

The most important thing I can think of is that you, or someone else, needs to oversee this. It can be a wonderful thing or an awful thing, but if no one is around to see what is actually going on, you will never know.
We hired one to be with my parents for about 3 months when I had no choice but to go back to work. She had zero experience, was kind enough, but didn't cook anything they would eat. She cooked her own ethnic (spicy) food, offered it to them, and didn't give them anything else if they declined. I kept their freezer stocked with casseroles, though, and she would give them small servings of that and finish it off herself. She also would leave Dad in bed until 1pm saying he was sleeping. But she would just peek in the door and see he had his eyes closed - because he didn't have his glasses on! Anyways, it was a nightmare, but it was necessary at the time and with covid, she was all we could find. I shudder to think what it would have been like had I just trusted she'd care for them and left her to it!
Also, my mom was mean to her. She yelled at her for showering and *gasp* washing her hair!!! So she was patient in that regard.

If you do this, ALL jewelry and important papers, checkbook, credit cards should be moved to your house. Have all her mail sent to your house.

My grandmother got a live-in caregiver from the county she lived in. I would advise you to contact your county seat and ask for office on aging. Hope this helps!

Have an iron clad contract. Find out what the labor laws for live-ins are. Their room and board is a perk not part of their salary. Have in the contract that if the client dies or has to be placed, their employment stops that day, meaning they always need a back up place to live. The client may not like them and you will need to let them go. Put in the contract whether they get 2 weeks pay when let go because of death or placed. This should be witnessed, signed and notarized. And as hard as it will be, keep it professional.

This is a new post you may want to read if you haven't already,

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/my-dad-was-located-in-ca-and-had-caregivers-that-came-in-for-shifts-paid-a-flat-rate-for-a-24hr-peri-476881.htm

I had to oversee a live-in caregiver for my aunt who lived in an independent-living (HUD) facility halfway across the country. It was difficult. My husband is an accountant; that made the employment part of it easier, as we wanted to do everything "on the books." It would have been easier doing it through an agency, but more expensive. The live-in caregiver will be your Mom's employee, and there are State regulations about employees, including having insurance, taking out payroll taxes, etc. It's best to have an accountant to help you navigate these requirments if you will not be using an agency. We got a daybed for the living room for the caregiver and I emptied out a closet for her. My aunt used the bedroom. The caregiver was kind and gentle, and the social worker and staff at my aunt's senior residence helped oversee her care. However, there were issues with how she handled the money. If you can, give cash directly to the caregiver for expenses. I had to send checks in my aunt's caregiver's name so that she would have cash for daily expenses. She depositied them in her account, but didn't let me know when the money was building up, and that the amount could be decreased. At the end, we agreed on an amount for her to pay me back for some of the excess. One caregiver was not enough in my aunt's last year, when she became completely bedridden. The caregiver could not handle turning her in bed, cleaning, etc. by herself. And she also needed time for breaks, sleeping and employees are entitled to meal breaks and vacation time. She arranged for a friend to assist her. We paid for her back-up's time during her vacation. Take over all of your mother's financial affairs. Remove all valuables from your Mom's apartment, or lock them up. Also remove any papers with financial information from the apartment, and have all her financial mail, bills, etc. sent to your address (or set up her accounts online as paperless). Visit your Mom as much as you can to oversee her care (and just to visit). For your own convenience, get a credit card on your mother's account with your name on it so that you can purchase things online for your mother. Don't share credit cards with the caregiver. You may want to remove your mother's credit card from the premises, if she is no longer able to use it safely. Set up accounts with your mother's pharmacist, etc. so that you can charge her presecriptions to her account. All the best to you both.

My uncle Bob had a live in caregiver in Staten Island N.Y. He hated her; accused her of starving him to death and ignoring his needs completely, but he was a blow-hard on a good day. My cousin went over to visit one day and found the caregiver loading up her car with all the silver and china from the dining room breakfront, into HIS luggage, and putting it into HER car! She fired the woman on the spot and dragged all the valuables back into her father's home. That's the only 'experience' I have with live in's, and it's second hand at that.

I had both of my folks living in Assisted Living which was less expensive than live in help 24/7, so that's the only first hand experience I have; they liked it quite well, too, but after dad died, mom eventually had to go into Memory Care AL in the same place and that she didn't love so much. Different ball of wax entirely.

I hope you find the perfect caregiver who's kind and honest, and one that your mom likes a lot. If you need someone 24/7, you'll likely need more than 1 person though, to split shifts, I would think. I'm sure you'll get lots of comments that are all over the map with different experiences, both good and bad. See if you can call references from prior clients for the gal you're considering; that would be your best bet.

we had a 24 hour live in 1400 a week plus 430 a week for the office that she worked for . One year thank god he has long term care insurance which paid about 5000 a month.