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Lyssax3 Asked September 2022

Who could I contact if I know my elderly neighbor is being taken advantage of?

I just moved into a new area back in December, the first person to ever say Hi to me was a nice old man across the hallway. It took us a few months but we eventually became friends. He took a hard fall last winter and I started going grocery shopping for him, helping him out with things like that. We used his car for a little while. I got into an accident in it and paid for a tow truck and damagaes. Well recently he had a "friend " move in with him. This lady is like 40 years old and homeless. She has been redecorating his whole apartment to HER LIKING. Yes his apartment needed a deep clean but she has moved things around and even threw things away. She's been using his car and she dosen't have any money to get it fixed if something happens. She had a flat tire and the old man had to pay for it. She's been taking his car for 24 hours not caring what he has to do or needs to go to. He needs a full-time caregiver and she's trying to be that but SHE'S NOT EVEN THERE AT NIGHT WHEN HE FALLS. He has to call the ambulance. I am recently 9 months pregnant and can't help him like I was and we see how she moved in and took advantage of him. I don't know who to call or what to do. He has no family, barely any friends. I'm just at my wits' end with it because I told him she's taking advantage of him and he still lets her do it. He used to be a drug addict and stopped due to health issues and she is a drug addict and I feel like she's feeding him drugs. I have no evidence but things have changed in the past 2 months to make me believe so. Who could I call to get them to look into this? He has nurses that come see him during the day and they all feel the same way. I just don't want to see him down and out and get evicted because of this lady. Please give me some advice.

freqflyer Sep 2022
Lyssax3, tomorrow call Adult Protective Services as others here have suggested. He is not your responsibility.

Lyssax3 Sep 2022
I go over to check on him and see if he ate and how he is feeling and he tells me everything THATS how I know his business. HE himself had told me multiple times if it wasnt for me and my boyfriend helping him he wouldn't know what to do because he has No Help . That's exactly why I keep saying I don't know what to do because he can make his own decisions ,but I don't want to sit back and watch this lady rob him and take advantage of him . That's why I came to this website to find suggestions on who to call or what to do . I'm pretty sure his nurses are taking notes but they definitely don't know what's going on behind closed because the women leaves when the nurses come and I don't know if I want to tell them everything or just let this lady continue to take advantage of him . He dosent have a good memory he barely remembers the day before . I have went a few days with out talking to him and he will call me and ask me if I'm mad at him , And that's not the case I'm just sick of watching this lady take advantage of him and he complain to me and him do nothing about it. I don't want him to feel like I'm mad at him But yes I have a lot of things going on myself to be worried about him has well ! .. but my conscience will not be right if something bad happens to him and i didnt try to get him help . He just started getting day time nurses , he dosent know how to get the help he needs , he has asked me before if I could call a few places for him to figure out about a caregiver but I never done anything like this before .
PeggySue2020 Sep 2022
You’ve seen paid caregivers come during the day. So he has help

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BarbBrooklyn Sep 2022
The next time he's in the hospital, DO NOT PICK HIM UP.

Get the number of the discharge planning office at the hospital and tell them he has NO reliable help at home.

AlvaDeer Sep 2022
You can call adult protective, but do know, if this gentleman is competent in his own care,then he can move in whomever he likes. I would call APS and tell them what you told us including that you were taking on a lot of care you cannot continue to do for him. Ask them if they will do a wellness check on him, and just try to feel around if this is a hired caretaker, or if this is a case of elder abuse. You seem to know an awful lot about this woman considering you are just a neighbor and I am wondering who told you all these things.
I wish you the best. Short of APS you have no recourse here I think.
Lyssax3 Sep 2022
I mean I'm 9 months pregnant and NOSEY I look out my window all day 🤣🤣🤷🏼‍♀️and I'm from a big city and now live in a small town .. it dosent take a whole lot to SEE what's going on . Shes one of the people who Talk to much . She done told her her whole life story multiple times .
MJ1929 Sep 2022
Call the police for a welfare check. Tell them what you know, and that he's a vulnerable adult. Ideally they'll scare off the freeloader, but she'll know he's on their radar at least. They might be able to get help for him faster than just calling Adult Protective Services. Call them, too, though.
Lyssax3 Sep 2022
Ses been pushing him to put her on his lease . She has no job so his rent won't go higher then what it is because We live in fixed income apartments. I don't want him to put her on his lease because he really never going to get her out of there then.
BarbBrooklyn Sep 2022
You call Adult Protective Services and the local Area Agency on Aging and report that he is a vulnerable adult in need of assistance.
Lyssax3 Sep 2022
His doctor sent a note home with him one day saying he needs a FULLTIME caregiver . I don't want her to try to be it because she's going to get money for that and she's never even there at night she's off " cleaning houses " . What could I do about this ? .. I don't want to be all in his business but should I stop his nurse outside one day and talk to her ?

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