Need help on how to handle a 97 yr. old aunt that I am the caregiver for with dementia that has become very abusive to me. Any advice?

This seems to be a dulicate but with two different names.

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/with-a-person-with-dementia-that-becomes-verbally-abusive-to-the-family-caregiver-who-takes-care-247-478058.htm

This one by whattodo.

MichelleSoulie, have your Aunt checked for an Urinary Tract Infection. An UTI in an older adult can cause the person to become verbally and physically abusive, along with other behaviors.

Your Aunt's primary doctor can run a UTI, even such a test is available at urgent care. If the test is positive, antibiotics can help clear the infection.

For more information on Alzheimer's/Dementia, go to the blue/green bar at the top of this page and click on CARE TOPICS. Look for Alzheimer's. You will find excellent articles on the different stages, what to look out for, and how to handle those stages.

I'd be putting in my 2 weeks notice to let your aunt's children know you're resigning your post as caregiver to a dementia patient. They can then do as they wish, either take over her care themselves or place her accordingly in a Memory Care AL where she'll be looked after 24/7.

In the meantime,  I suggest you read this 33 page booklet (a free download) which has THE best information ever about managing dementia and what to expect with an elder who's been diagnosed with it.

Understanding the Dementia Experience, by Jennifer Ghent-Fuller 
https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/210580

Jennifer is a nurse who worked for many years as an educator and counsellor for people with dementia and their families, as well as others in caring roles. She addresses the emotional and grief issues in the contexts in which they arise for families living with dementia. The reviews for her books are phenomenal b/c they are written in plain English & very easy to read/understand. Her writings have been VERY helpful for me.

The full copy of her book is available here:
https://www.amazon.com/Thoughtful-Dementia-Care-Understanding-Experience/dp/B09WN439CC/ref=sr_1_2?crid=2E7WWE9X5UFXR&keywords=jennifer+ghent+fuller+books&qid=1657468364&sprefix=jennifer+ghent%2Caps%2C631&sr=8-2

Wishing you the best of luck extricating yourself from this situation asap.

Dementia or not, no one deserves to be abused in any way shape or form. Time for your aunt to be placed in the appropriate facility.

Sorry about this. Me, I would make arrangements for her to be placed in a home. I am not big into accepting abuse. They do not get better, it gets worse and worse.

Take care of you.