Mom moved into independent living section of a CCRC Type A facility with MC, AL and SNF all on-site. That was one of the main reasons she selected this facility. Mom developed dementia and facility wanted her to move into MC within months. Mom was still in the VERY early stages of dementia and such a move seemed premature.
During the COVID lockdown she fell and broke her leg. There were Covid-positive residents in MC and SNF sections at that time so I decided to bring in private caregivers to her IL apartment to assist her 24/7 while recovering, rather than move her into a unit where there were active outbreaks of Covid infection. She fully recovered from the broken bone but her dementia progressed (she’s middle stage now) during the last couple of years so family and doctors agree it is time for MC. Unfortunately the facility is saying she has “missed the window” and MC will not be of benefit to her now. Furthermore they say the unit is currently “pretty high functioning now” and she would require more physical assistance than most of the other “high functioning” residents require (mom needs some assistance in the shower, uses Depends due to long-standing incontinence and a walker for mobility, but is otherwise able to do most other things - with occasional reminders/prompts), so they don’t won’t accept her into MC.
I have even offered to pay for private caregivers to assist her 1:1 during waking hours but they don’t want that. They want her to go straight into SNF unit. I think this is crazy. She is slow and weaker but still ambulatory. Cognitively she is in the middle dementia stage so she could absolutely make use of MC activities and programming. She is pleasant, talkative and not disruptive at all. And with her own caregiver on the MC unit, she would be virtually no extra work for facility staff. Going directly to the SNF unit, I fear they’ll just let her languish in bed all day with no specialized cognitive engagement/activities so I’m reticent to proceed to SNF.
Any suggestions?
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My mother lived in a Memory Care Assisted Living facility for nearly 3 years. Started out with moderate dementia and scoring about a 13 on the MoCA exam, incontinent and wheelchair bound. By the time she died in February, I'd be surprised if she'd score a 6 on the MoCA, had very advanced dementia and more issues than Newsweek, the poor woman. And she was cared for and treated like a queen the entire time by the staff, even on the days she fell 3x in 2 hours because she forgot she couldn't walk. I never had to hire a personal aide, either, or her funds would've been used up very quickly and I'd have had to apply for Medicaid to get her into a SNF. That's what I was trying desperately to AVOID.
Something is very wrong with what this place is telling you. Throw the "lawyer" word around with them or move her out of there and into a Memory Care of your choice. Here in my state, however, entry into a CCRC requires a large buy-in fee up front.....so if thats the case with your mom, that's a big problem. You're not going to do what THEY want regarding her care.....you've got to do WHAT YOU want. What'll it take to achieve that? Maybe a lawyer or the threat of bringing one in to look over their entire operation which sounds awfully FISHY imo.
Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation
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Check your contract and then tell the administrator or whoever is blocking the move to MC that your attorney is going to be reviewing the contract. I'm hesitating on just telling you to move her to a facility because most real CCRC's require a large entrance fee and you may have passed the time limit to get any of those funds back. Additionally you may have to come up with another entrance fee to get her into a new facility that you like. If the care is good but the administration is loopy and greedy, you might want her to stay there so the mention of the lawyer may put them in their place quickly.
Also this is the a clue for your to check out their long term operation which can vary greatly from facility to facility. In both of the facilities in which I worked residents were invited to activities based on their interests and their needs, not on which care unit in which they resided.
Please keep us updated. Good luck and blessings to you!
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Throwing the lawyer word is one option for sure. IMO though you might want to look for an MC elsewhere if that is a financial option. If they treat you guys this shadily now you might be fighting more battles if they do let her in. Who knows what else they might try to get away with?
Dementia is hard enough without dealing with stuff like this. So sorry you are going through the wringer! Huge hug and truly wishing you the best
Sounds to me like this facility is just "filling beds" regardless of the residents' actual needs to satisfy their business model. Which would cause me to find another facility, if I were you. Maybe consult with an attorney if she is bound by a contract. You may want to hint to the facility that you're reviewing the contract with an attorney...
Skilled nursing is for people who need constant MEDICAL care like rehabbing from a surgery, a broken hip, or stroke. DO NOT put your mom there, because the one thing SNF does very poorly is care for dementia patients.
Does the SNF seem pleasant, peaceful, well run, well staffed?
There are numerous structured activities in my LO’s SNF, although she has been a passive participant since entering it.
However “the window” was established by administration, COVID has done nothing but make decision making harder and more painful and difficult for every aspect of patients’ lives and staff care.
If she goes to the SNF with an aide for part of her day, would you feel more comfortable with that?
We do rely so much on each other but Covid doesn't care. Unfortunately, social distancing is not possible in memory care and nursing homes because residents are there for their primary reason, CARE.
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