Do I have any legal rights from employment?

Well, since she clearly doesn’t want to hear the truth, just something positive we shouldn’t half ass it.

Carrie, get a piece of pink construction paper. Cut it into the shape of a heart and write mom’s name on it in crayon. Next full moon, carefully fold the paper up and bury it under the biggest leaf in a cabbage patch. The next day, it will have turned into a unicorn. The unicorn will use its horn create some magic dust that you can mix in with mom’s drink, and she’ll wake up 30 years younger the next day.

Just saw your reply to Catskie. I think taking FMLA leave is a good idea but make sure you understand what taking this leave means.

"However, your job may be protected under the federal Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) or the New Jersey Family Leave Act (NJFLA), which require covered employers to provide their employees with unpaid, job-protected leave up to 12wks"

The above does not guarantee you the same job back, just a comparable one at the same pay rate.

"Generally, private employers with at least 50 employees are covered by the law. Private employers with fewer than 50 employees are not covered by the FMLA, but may be covered by state family and medical leave laws."

Your employer may not be required to give you leave if under a certain number of employees.

The US Dept of Labor has a fact sheet explaining how FMLA works. From previous posts, you can take your time off in increments.

If you find you can take this leave, I may not start until u find out Moms discharge date. 12 weeks is only 3 months. Good Luck and I hope it all works out for you.

One more thing, there is really no way to be positive unless u want us to say the Labor Board will be behind you. Yes, a lawyer will take your case. But in both instances, neither will be able to do anything. Thats the reality of your situation. If Mom is 95 then you are 60 or older? Old enough that you have worked for a long time and know how employment works. The employee rarely wins. I have seen where people can't be fired by law, but the employer finds a loophole and the person is fired. And never think your irreplaceable. They will always find someone to take your place.

I received a PM from Carriebx. Her mother is the 95 yr old. She also didn't think my post was positive. Really, I gave her suggestions on how to get her Mom help if she ends up having to take the 9 to 5 job. This is a portion of her message:

"right now I need some positivity and not some straightforward nonsense from a bunch of people quite honestly so unless you’re going to be helpful with some positivity don’t reply to me that includes everybody."

I really have no idea what we can say positive about her job. Its what it is. There is no legal recourse Carrie. An employer doesn't have to bend over backwards for her. It comes down to, if you don't like it, you have the ability to get another job.

My DH worked 20 yrs on night shift and I so could have used him at home with 2 kids. Even his Union could do nothing because he was low man on the Totem poll. Then a lot of employees retired. Finally, he got on dayshift but then our kids were grown.

Really Carrie I am sorry for the predicament you are in. There really is no positivity in your predicament. You need to make choices.

You take the 9 to 5 shift or your look for a job where you can get night shift.

If you have to take the 9 to 5 job, then you need to find someone to be with Mom while you work or place her in Long term care.

You quit working to care for Mom.

The positive side would be that an aide that has nightshift wants a day shift and you can trade shifts.

Yes, this is all overwhelming. We as Caregivers have all been overwhelmed. Its not easy juggling your life around a parent whose needs are so great.

You can ask your employer to change the shift time, but they can say no. They have no obligations to meet your family commitments.

You'll have to choose from what's available.

The Job at the new hours, which means finding a different care solution for Mom VS let the job go, care for Mom 9-5.

Which would you regret giving up more?

Carrie, you should be careful how you interpret responses.

I don't care what you think of your rights. If they can't accommodate the prior schedule you are free to move on. 6 weeks on the job doesn't typically qualify anyone for anything. Fmla probably isn't on your horizon with a 6 week old job.

Yes, you are choosing to take care of your mom. If you want to pretend otherwise, you are only fooling yourself.

I am also a bit confused about who she is careing for, a man or her Mom? Are they 2 different people? I'm not even sure what her job is although I tend to think she is a home care aide? I wish her luck on this. If she is a HCA then perhaps they can find her another person to care for part time also, and that would help her paycheck? There is plenty of need for caregivers, so this may be something to look into to.

Are you in a right to work state? Regardless, they can have you work whatever hours they want, and will sack you if you can’t make your shifts.

Sounds like Mom should stay in the nursing home where she belongs.

I think she is caring for a 95 yr old man that is her job. Night shift is good for her because her Mom may also need care.

Sorry, Carrie that you feel Geaton's suggestion was doom and gloom but sometimes solutions for a problem are not that easy. In my opinion, you have no recourse legally.

I will tackle your employment. An employer is not obligated to give you what you want or need. Where are you seniority wise because that usually determines who gets the hours they want. I agree that if you do not take the 9 to 5 shift, you may not have a job. Without a union behind you, not much u can do. If you are let go, hopefully its a layoff so you can collect unemployment. If fired, you still can collect but it takes longer to get unemployment. I have gone to a Labor Board because I was told I had to work over the 40 hrs and I wouldn't. (I was salary so no overtime) I was told that yes the law was 40 hrs but if I wanted to keep my job, I probably should comply. I was only protected if I had a union. So, it comes down to, you really have no rights here. The employer holds the cards and if you want to keep ur job, you play the game.

Now Mom

If you end up taking the 9 to 5 shift, then you may need to find help while you are working for Mom. You first will need to talk to PT at rehab to see how Mom is progressing? What type of help will she need when she comes home? They may recommend PT at home. This may mean a therapist coming for PT in the morning and OT coming in the afternoon. An aid being supplied 3x a week for bathing. You may be lucky and u can get the aide for longer periods of time. Medicare does have "intermittent care" that a member has used for her Mom and Aunt. If Mom is low income, she maybe able to get Medicaid to come in for a few hours a day. Where I live if the LO or friend fits the criteria, a family member/friend can be trained by an agency and then hired by that agency and allowed to care for the LO/friend. The Caregiver receives the same benefits as any other employee. Talk to the SW at Rehab to see what resources are out there for your Mom. Also, Ofgice of Aging maybe able to help.

Sorry, but on this forum we tell it like it is. There are a few that have worked as CNAs/aides in the private sector so they know what they are talking about. Sorry your going thru this.

You need to contact the department of labor or economic security. There are far to many variables for anyone to help you on an anonymous caregiving forum.

Last time I checked, your rights were to work the available hours or not. An employer has no obligation to your personal choices.

Remember, small businesses DO NOT have the same requirements that bigger businesses do regarding federal and some state laws.

Carrie, is the place mom is currently in awful?

What are the discharge planning folks telling you about what level of care mom needs?

Is mom eligible for Medicaid?

No one wants to make you feel bad, but those of us who are posting here have "been there, done that". It's never just one fall.

The response that upset you is from someone who is caring for THREE superannuated loved ones. I would listen carefully to her advice; I was going to post the same.

IF you live in NYC and your Medicaid planning folks think they can get mom 24/7 aides, that might be an option.

Carrie, Is she doing any better walking again? Have you spoken with your human resources office? Maybe you can take FMLA

If she fell (I'm guessing at home) this won't be her last fall, rehab or not. And at 95 you should have very tempered expectations about whether rehab will actually be able to improve her or not.

I am currently in a situation where my 100-yr old LO fell at home. I chose to forego the partial hip replacement surgery for many reasons, but mainly because it would probably not get her mobility back. She has dementia and will not cooperate with the PT. She cannot come back home since she will now need way more help, more hours per day, just to do basic care. Whereas prior we were able to safely walk her to the bathroom, now she will need incontinence briefs and lift assistance, turning, etc. You certainly would not be able to do this on your own.

Please just explore a facility option for her. Talk to her physician to see if she qualifies for LTC (which in most states Medicaid will cover). Also consult with a Medicaid Planner for her state so that you know what your options are. It may be very useful that she can go from rehab right to a facility that you choose.

Also, as an employer in the past: we have always made every attempt to accommodate our employees so that their personal lives were as least stressful as possible BUT there comes a point where we just can't do it and be profitable at the same time, or unfairly burden the other employees to cover for one person. This is why I'm suggesting to just look into the option of facility care. My 88-yr old MIL is in an excellent LTC facility on Medicaid. She gets great care, and has staff who come and joke with her, take her to meals and activities, etc. She'd *never* get that in our home (we are still working 3/4 time).

The caregiving arrangement is often about "least bad option". Your Mom will need more care than you can give, and you need to have a job that provides enough for you. I wish you wisdom and peace in your heart.

You can check your States website at Department of Labor and read what rights you do have.
I am not an expert but my gut tells me you have 2 options. Take the hours your employer is offering or not. If you chose not to take the hours you will be looking for another job. You can always put in for another shift and when an opening comes up depending on seniority you may get it. If that is what you want.
Have you looked into other options for caring for your mom? Does she qualify for services from Agency on Aging, local Senior Services?
Will mom be able to manage on her own once she does come home? If not would she qualify for Skilled Nursing? discuss with a Social Worker what options there are if mom can not manage on her own.
You could apply for Family Medical Leave that will hold a position but you may not get the same job, same hours. Look again at your State Labor Department website to see what your options are.