My parents live in AL now. Their only income is SS and a pension (state of Ohio). Dad needs to go into a nursing home, but what to do with Mom?

TLC
So many details will have to be worked out. I’m sure this is very stressful.
From reading here on the forum, when your dad has to go in the NH, his income will be separated from your moms but she, as the community spouse, will be eligible for a portion of his income.
Please see an elder law attorney who is an expert for the Medicaid rules in your parents state. It is my understanding that enough of dads income will go to mom so as not to leave her impoverished, if that portion is enough to pay her ALF, I’m not sure.
If it is best for mom to stay in the ALF for now, then she would be able to do that if their state law allows, I have never read this particular question before. It is usually an issue when one is staying in the community in their own home and the other goes into care. Neither am I sure what happens should your dad pass before your mom and his SS and pension stops.
Many ALF do not take Medicaid.
Having them both together I’m sure had many benefits. Let us know what you find out. There will be others who will need this information. I know it must be heartbreaking to separate them. To qualify for a NH with Medicaid, one must meet both financial and medical requirements. If mom doesn’t need skilled care, she would not qualify for Medicaid. Perhaps you would want to have an understanding with the NH you move dad to that mom could move in with him when she passes that threshold should it occur.
There is also the issue of having too much income to qualify for Medicaid but the attorney would be able to help you navigate through all this.

I am bumping this question back to the first page so it can be seen easier.

You need to see an elder law attorney in their state. Asap.

What kind of shape is your mom in? I think she can keep her own SS but I doubt that's enough to pay for AL. Could she manage in independent living? Senior housing developments are sometimes gov't funded with a sliding scale payment from the senior. Meaning they pay what they can afford. My MIL was in one and had nothing but her SS and only paid about $200/month in rent cuz that was really all that she could afford after meds and food.

If your mom needs care, she might just have to go in the nursing home with dad. Maybe they could share a room and still be together? Knowing nothing about her, I can see many reasons why this might not be workable but also could be a possibility.

After having my mom live with me and hubby for 7 years, I would advise you not to consider moving mom in with you. It can be very hard and damage your relationship.

Unfortunately, Medicaid will count all types of income for care. Your mom will get an allowance to live in the AL and count all what's left for your dad's care. Contact a Medicaid specialist and eldercare attorney now for assistance.

They won’t take it all because your mom is alive and can’t leave her without $$ for her own care. Medicaid is tricky to navigate though. Find a social worker/ advocate to help you. I’m guessing either facility or your city can help you find help. Best of luck.

If he will be on Medicaid, she will likely be allocated some of his income as a “community spouse.” The allowable amount varies by state.

Educate yourself by checking your state’s Medicaid web site and make sure she isn’t ignored in his application process. Consult an elder law attorney knowledgeable about Medicaid if necessary, but be ready to ask intelligent questions.

Could she also qualify for Medicaid? If so can she transition to it at the AL?

My parents are in the same boat (but Mom-Dad situation reversed). Shockingly, I learned recently that he won’t qualify for Medicaid because his measly social security alone—which is all he has left—puts him (slightly) above the limit. The limit here is $2300/month. Which wouldn’t be enough for a tent under the expressway in a major city, let alone an AL. It’s deplorable, and a very frightening situation. He can’t live with me, as he needs nurses and aides nearby for his medical condition. He can’t have skilled nursing anymore (which is really where he belongs), as he exceeded his 100 days.

The system is broken. I would also suggest speaking to an elder care attorney, as others mentored, or an elder care hotline at least if your state has such resources.

I agree with others who have already suggested that you need professional guidance to navigate the Medicaid system and, indeed all of the " systems" associated with care . This help may come from an Elder Care Attorney very educated with Medicaid and elder rights or, it may come from a licensed social worker who is adept and committed to helping families with Medicaid and other placement needs. Unfortunately not all social workers nor attorneys are equal to the task, so be vigilant to ask pertinent questions before engaging one.
Some places actually use the term " navigator" to help families and patients do just that, navigate a broken, greedy system fraught with many potholes. Good luck !
Get professional help ...you may try calling your local senior services or agency on aging services for potential referrals. If they are already in a facility you may be able to utilize a facility resource ( social worker or other " navigator" professional, but don't count on it ). Unfortunately one has to be a strong advocate not only for the patients
( family members in care) but also an advocate for oneself. Educate oneself as much as possible...

Practice good self care !

Go to elder atty that specializes in Medicaid applications. They can evaluate the financial situation. They can answer your specific questions about how much each parent will be left with, they can create trusts if needed as well.

Medicaid rules can be a little different in each state and vary how the non-NH person gets to keep money instead of all of it following the person who needs the NH care. AL usually is not covered by Medicaid and, in most cases, self pay all the way. It is very possible that mom won't have enough funds left, after the amt that follows dad to the NH.