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Gavidia Asked January 2023

My 70 year old father is peeing on himself everyday and will not shower. He is diabetic & had 6 bypass surgeries. He has not taken his medicine. Any advice?

he has fallen several times. He is also using meth. He is refusing any kind of medical attention and I don’t know what else to do

Frank1776 Jan 2023
He appears to need to be in a facility that can care for him. Sad situation.

JoAnn29 Jan 2023
I agree with everyone. If the apartment is not yours, move out. When you do, call Adult Pritection Services and report a vulnable adult. There is no law that says you must care for him. If your apartment, take him to the ER. You can speak to a SW or just walk away. Give them no info on you. If they do contact you, tell them he cannot return to your apt because you will not care for a meth head. He needs help and you not it. They will call APS in.

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Daughterof1930 Jan 2023
You cannot reason with anyone using meth. Don’t even try. Separate yourself from this situation, sad as that may be. Call Adult Protective Services and report him as a vulnerable person and let them handle what you cannot

Geaton777 Jan 2023
Take him to the ER and do not go back to get him. Talk to a social worker there to explain he is an "unsafe discharge". If you liivee with him in his own home, it may be difficult to refuse to bring him back, but you must as this is your only real option. What happens next is that the social services will place him in a facility (if he is deemed incapacitated) and the county will acquire guardianship of him, and take care of all his needs.

If you can't get him to the ER yourself, call 911 and they will bring him. If you don't live with him you can report him to APS as a vulnerable adult and he will then be attended by social services, then county guardianship, but this process may not happen fast so you'll need to stand back and be patient as you watch the train wreck. It will be bad at first and then it will get better.

Sadinroanokeva Jan 2023
Nursing home! Call a local elder gov agency social worker.

CTTN55 Jan 2023
From your profile: "I am caring for my father Alberty, who is 59 years old, living at home with age-related decline, diabetes, heart disease, incontinence, and lung disease."

So is he 59 or is he 70? You can't be 59 (and have a 70 year old father).

So who assigned you the caregiving job. I hope you are not expected to do it because you are the oldest and the only daughter.

You don't know what to do? Well, as someone already responded...MOVE OUT.

ZippyZee Jan 2023
Move out. Don’t involve yourself with a meth head. Call 911 next time he uses and have him taken away.

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