How do I deal with stroke victim wanting to go to gym when it is not safe for him to do so?

In addition to everyone else’s suggestions, why not allow the gym to forbid him from going there? If you don’t take him and the gym bars the door if he shows up without you (somehow), problem solved.

I mention showing up without you because the husband of a neighbor managed to call a Uber and disappear from the care home where he was living. The Uber took him to his marital home a hundred miles away. He didn’t get to stay long but he was proud of himself for doing it.

Exercise releases endorphins. He knows that he feels better when he exercises.

Still, he has to exercise safely. Is there a guided exercise program that he can participate in?

Mlewis1156, curious if the Memory Care facility offered physical therapy?

My Dad was in Memory Care and he really enjoyed his twice a week physical therapy which were strength exercises. Medicare paid for this therapy, at that time.

When my Dad transferred to Memory Care it is very important to remember that "routine" is the best approach to dementia. Thus, I rarely took Dad off the facility property [doctor appts once in a great while].

You probably are wearing thin of the constant battle of him wanting to go to the gym. Does he ask any of the Staff to take him to the gym, or just you? If it is just you, then his brain is relating you to the gym because you had taken him there.

Let's hope his brain will forget focusing on the gym in due time.

He's probably seeking the "runner's high" that I suspect my own husband is addicted to. If my husband can't work out six days a week, he feels sick, complains about headaches, and is just a pill to be around. He thinks this obsession is healthy, but I tend to disagree because some day he won't be physically able to work out to this extent, and he'll be miserable all the time.

Moderation in all things, I say. Your husband needs to move (or thinks he does), so I would say you need to find something he can do safely where he is and with a doctor's approval.

Just say NO! After passing out unconscious and falling last time you took him, that little activity is OFF the agenda permanently, doctors orders. Period. Tell him you're tired of beating a dead horse about the gym, and he can either drop the subject or you can leave, his choice. Stick to your guns on that and the requests should start falling off after you leave the first time.

Fact is, the man cannot go to the gym unless you are willing to take him and you're not.

I guess he is not aware of how old he is. A 72 yr old probably could not lift 300lbs anymore. Both my brothers gave up lifting years ago because of the damage it did to their backs to the point of surgery. Both in their 60s now. You may want to remind him he is 72 and since he hasn't done lifting in quite a while, he is out of shape to take it on now. But then, looks like he is in a loop. Maybe, tell him he needs to do back strengthening exercises before you would even consider taking him to a gym.

I think the larger question is whether or not your husband is currently CAPABLE of understanding that he cannot do this. You say he is in Memory Care. That would indicate he is not capable of making this decision.
I would, if you are his MPOA, go to his MD with him, and allow his MD to explain to him just what sort of exercise is now considered medically safe for his condition. Then that is what you must insist he is limited to.
Doesn't mean he will be happy he cannot go anymore, but it DOES mean he cannot go anymore if the MD feels it is unsafe. That covers you. You aren't responsible. You are obeying doctors orders.
Then do let his memory care place know that any exercises he CAN do should be encouraged.
We all have to give up things we wish we could still do. And it is always yet another loss. And we shouldn't expect to be happy about it. It is sad, and something to mourn. So let his emotions be expressed. That's a healthy way of handing the pain of another loss.
I sure wish you luck. But time to make the Doc the bad guy.

When you say "it's a daily question" do you mean you visit every day?

If you find that you must do that, I would simply state that the DOCTOR says it is no longer safe for him to go to the gym.

Does he have exercise bands in his room that he can use?