agency to assist with having an aide, nurse and physical therapist. Well nobody showed up besides a nurse twice, I was caring for her as she had a stroke in October 2022 so she is not mobile, incontinent, and takes two to assist her with transfers. I just became her daughter in law ab a month now as I married her son whom right now currently is incarcerated along with another son. I have tried my best to assist/ care for her so she can be back home but I’m currently 33 weeks pregnant, getting Braxton hicks contractions, and it’s getting very difficult for me to lift up on her. She currently had a rash that worsened over time to me having to bring her to the hospital ER to find out she is diagnosed with shingles, one hospital discharged her back home with me sending her home in an ambulance to me sending her back two days later but to a different hospital because the rash got worse. The ER DR admitted her to now looking to discharge her back home when there is nobody to care for her as I’m not capable of doing being almost due to have my baby, my dr doesn’t want me around her with shingles as it’s unsafe as well as me lifting up on her to assist with bathroom, to go to bed..etc. The nurse from the agency that seen her twice been coordinating with the hospital case manager making her aware of the situation at hand assuring them it’s unsafe to discharge her home and she is regressing in her care instead of progressing from not getting the proper care, physical therapy. My question is can they discharge her back home with no after care, and the case manager just spoke with me to get her Medicaid with spend down as she currently has Medicare/Community Medicaid. Isn’t her job as being the case manager to assist with help getting her Medicaid as she can get it done faster than me especially because she needs to get her placed back into a skilled nursing facility?
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Sounds like you & baby have some real dangers to navigate - money, job? Place to live. Your MIL with care requirements is just the tip of the iceberg.
Seek help to start afresh.
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You've only been married a month. When did your H go to prison? How long will he be there for? I hope he didn't marry you so that you would be his mother's caregiving slave.
You're getting to the part of a pregnancy where you should NOT be lifting, and she's likely like lifting a bag of wet cement.
Is your husband going to be incarcerated for a long time or will he be around soon? This really is his and his brother's problem.
Do let the hospital SW work on a place to put this woman. You cannot care for her appropriately along with an infant.
I'm not going to weigh in on your choice to have married someone who is in jail. That is your decision, your life. All I'd say is, I hope you have a marketable skill, b/c you will likely have to work all your life and the better educated you are, the better a chance for a decent job.
Good Luck.
Correct. It's your decision OP.
But I will weigh in on it: I warn you as a friend. Please OP, stay away from criminals. It'll bring a whole host of other problems in the future...
MIL goes to a facility. Pronto, however you can accomplish that.
"There is nothing in this situation that benefits you or your baby."
Benefit? It's possible OP is there because she wants to live in MIL's house.
I'm saying this, because maybe you make unwise decisions, and they will spill into your future for years...
About MIL, I guess you're living in her house? That's how you ended up being her caregiver? (I'm sure you wouldn't be attempting to be her full-time caregiver if you had your own house.) ...And you plan to continue living in her house, also when you succeed at placing your MIL in a NH? I'm guessing that's your plan.
If your MIL is mentally competent, then she's allowed to live in her house if she wants, even if it's dangerous for her. No one can force her to stay in a NH. She's allowed to discharge herself.
Please speak to a trusted, wise friend who knows you. Someone who can help you make wise decisions. You must rescue your future, and stay away from criminals.