How do I stay in contact with my relative who has dementia?

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Careforcarol1 Asked May 2023

How do I stay in contact with my relative who has dementia?

My relative is in an assisted care facility. She has vascular dementia and hallucinates. Her vision is also poor. She has a cell phone and calls family members frequently. However, she also calls the police frequently saying there are bad things going on. The police recognize her condition. However, the facility wants to take her phone away and make her dependent on their concierge phone. She is recovering from a stomach virus and has been quarantined. The concierge said they won’t give her their phone if she is in quarantine. Unfortunately, all he family members live on a the east coast and the facility is in Washington State. Is there a phone or device on the market which would allow her freedom to call us, but prevent her from calling the police?

Activities of Daily Living Alzheimer's & Dementia Assisted Living Communication & Language

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score 0 · Answer 1

Whatever you get, you will need to pay for and install it yourself. Don't expect any learrning or retention to happen at her end so it needs to be something that requires 0 action from her in order to communicate. Also remember that with dementia (and hallucinations), she may be freaked out by someone suddenly remotely talking to her in her room (if it's just audio with no video).

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score 0 · Answer 2

With an Echo Show, someone can drop in and speak to your mother.

There are phones out there that can be programmed to just allow calls to certain people.

Here is one:

https://www.razmobility.com/solutions/memory-cellphone/?gclid=Cj0KCQjwpPKiBhDvARIsACn-gzCr7mQa3gMRerIoDSCSPPqIL0FtFiBeo7_rb0XJ4yi_Xx-NH9Sfkr4aAu_tEALw_wcB

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score 1 · Answer 3

Calling 911 or the police is serious. When she calls relatives, is it a coherent conversation? Do these relatives really want to hear from her? Or just want the ability to call her. I can see why the facility does not want to use their phone. And when they do allow it, its probably u calling her. I would not expect staff to bring her the phone every time she wants to call someone.

She is missusing the phone because she knows no better. Explaining to her she can't call police is going thru one ear and out the other. If the facility is requesting it be taken away, maybe the police have complained. Time to "lose" it.

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How do I stay in contact with my relative who has dementia?

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