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Eribo70 Asked May 2023

I have lived with my parents caring for them for the last 15 yrs. Both dementia. As a caregiver do I have rights to live here after they die?

JoAnn29 May 2023
"My parents home is under two of my siblings name"

Sounds to me like siblings own the home. Probably done this way so the house does not go thru Probate. Sorry to say, you have no rights to the home. Upon ur parents death, your siblings can ask you to leave, or if you want to stay, rent from them.

I am with Barb. I think I would be having a talk with the siblings about what happens when parents are not living in the house anymore. Your adult son needs to be holding down a job and supporting himself. Once you know where u stand with siblings, you can plan for ur future.

BarbBrooklyn May 2023
Eribo, I am going to be very straight with you:

You recently separated from an abusive spouse.

You moved in with your parents (along with an adult son).

You provide caregiving to parents but are not paid for this.

You have a problem standing up for yourself.

I hope you have an excellent divorce attorney who will get you a more than fair settlement.

I hope you have or will be getting a job that capitalizes on your talents and pays you well.

I hope you can find a kind and tough therapist who can help you learn how not to accept poor treatment.

Been there, done that.

You deserve better.

Mare a plan, today, to leave your parents' home. Your sibling with POA can pay someone to do the caregiving. You need a job that will pay into SS.

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Countrymouse May 2023
Looking at your profile, perhaps we'd better clarify.

You have been your parents' primary caregiver for 15 years, but you recently separated from your spouse and moved in with your parents together with your adult son.

Two of your siblings have power of attorney for your parents and manage their finances and other major decisions. Both of your parents have dementia, so it seems reasonable to suppose that you must have moved into their home with your siblings' agreement. What was the understanding you reached with them?

How recent is "recently"?

I'm glad you got away from an abusive marriage, but don't exchange one unacceptable situation for another. As your siblings have power of attorney, providing for your parents' care needs is their responsibility and not yours. It's time to think about how you want to move forward with your life. Don't start out in conflict with the people who (quite correctly) control your parents' finances and will own the property you currently live in, and don't bind yourself to sacrifices you can't afford to make. Do you have any property or income of your own?

polarbear May 2023
Are you being paid for providing care for your parents? If not, you should be.

Beatty May 2023
"My parents home is under two of my siblings name".

Is this correct?

Caregiving is caregiving.

Property ownership is property ownership.

You have chosen to generously gift your care, time & labour.

I am not a lawyer, but unless at the time they both pass you have a valid tennant lease in place, I cannot see any rights to remain living there. The owners/siblings can sell. You must leave if they want you to. Unless you sign with any new owners to continue renting.

The usual scenario is the home gets sold to fund care costs, if/when facility care is required.

I get this is your home. But my answer is unemotional on purpose. You may benefit from a more practical approach to build steps, now & after caregiving.

You will need your own 'exit strategy' to re-house yourself for starters. Maybe that can become a plan? Saving towards your own apartment?

PeggySue2020 May 2023
Is the house willed to you only? Then yes provided they die.

If it’s not and they both die, then on death of them both, the executor of the will is legally obligated to divide the proceeds how your parents saw fit.

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