Find Senior Care (City or Zip)
Join Now Log In
L
Lolaloud Asked June 2023

My aunts boyfriend has my family antiques not supposed to have them after two years he still has them they are very old. What to do?

Here the thing my aunt died in 2021 right ok it was a total mess her boyfriend and my cousins were fighting about the house antiques furniture clothing jewelry they were very greedy right so he bought a house cause my cousins forced him to move we were cleaning it out we saw the antiques they were supposed be ours to split that what it said in her will. He’s still has them and plus a very old cabinet we don’t know why he still has these things we might have to
take him to court they were my grandmas not his he has no legal right to them I guess when they moved him into his new house they took the antiques by accident it’s a mess the whole situation we just want our antiques back this just came up this weekend we were supposed to pick what we wanted from the stash he even has very old pictures to

JoAnn29 Jun 2023
Thank you Igloo. As u read, my thoughts exactly. Though unless the boyfriend had paperwork saying he had lifetime rights to stay in the house or Aunt left that provision in the Will, BF really didn't have a leg to stand on. If the Will says the house was to be sold and proceeds split between the beneficiaries not much BF could do. Yes, heirs could maybe have rented it to him but I would say most people want the money in hand. Yes, the Executor is at fault here in my opinion too. If probate closed then all beneficiaries excepted the final accting. It was when the beneficiaries received the accting they should have protested.

ZippyZee Jun 2023
You've heard the phrase "that ship has sailed", yes?

Well, not only has that ship sailed, it's crossed unknown oceans, found a new world, started a colony, and that colony is currently fighting for its independence.

Let it go.

ADVERTISEMENT


Daughterof1930 Jun 2023
There are many antiques and other things from my family history that for varying reasons I’ll never see again. And the truth of it is, they are just things, no matter who got or gets them, no one is getting out of here alive and taking anything with them. It’s all just stuff and in the end, doesn’t matter a bit. I hope you can come to peace and move on from this

igloo572 Jun 2023
If it’s 2 years since distribution of dead Aunties estate done and filed with Orders (of assets) done in probate court, then it’s over with. The Executor - whomever it was - would have been responsible for dealing with the assets as per the terms of Aunts will.

If the will stated “Prudent Mallard 4 p bedroom set & armoire” was to go to Cousin Vinnie, then it was Executors job to find a value on this specific and special asset & enter it as such for the required probate inventory filing & then make the removal and delivery to Vinnie happen. (Fwiw Mallard furniture is tres collectible, $ 50K++ range if in good condition)). Did that happen on the pieces??? If not, then probably were they considered household furnishings at a tag sale price for the inventory. Sometimes old furniture is just old furniture if no provenance.

So heirs made the old boyfriend move out of the home he shared with your Aunt. Executor or their representative should have been there to do oversight that all was done for household contents as per will. If they didn’t and stuff moved that should have remained OR probate closed and it shouldn’t have, it’s on the Executor. If you were a heir, you got a Notice of your “standing” (as per the will) in this drama. Do you have “standing”??? And it’s on you as an individual with standing to have asked of the Executor about items you thought due to you did in fact exist & do this in a timely manner. If you have standing, you can file a contest to distribution before probate closes. If you & others with standing accepted other items as per the will, basically means you have been ok with what Executor did.

In hindsight y’all shouldn’t have been so quick to 86 Aunties old boyfriend. Instead of sharing loss & bereavement with him, you & your family created an enemy. You want to be upset with someone, be upset with the Executor. So who was the Executor in this dramarama??

JoAnn29 Jun 2023
Now I understand the conservator thing. But the man was able to move to a house he bought so I don't know how you thought you could get conservatorship. Seems he is competent.

As I said before, there was a Will then there is an Executor that should have requested the belongings back. If BF would not comply, then a lawyer, then the court, maybe small claims. But this has been allowed to go on for 2 yrs.
NeedHelpWithMom Jun 2023
Exactly! “Will” being the key word in all of this.Without a will she is just spinning her wheels going nowhere.

I agree with Alva. She needs to let it go and move on even though it’s painful for her.

My mother lost her home all of its contents in hurricane Katrina. It’s devastating but in the end it’s all just things. That’s it!

The fact that my mom’s life was spared by evacuating with us was the most important thing.

We can’t allow material possessions to be the most important part of our lives.
Emma1817 Jun 2023
Periods commas and paragraph breaks right are really useful when you want to make yourself understood.

Seriously, though, you can kiss all that stuff goodbye. Aunt’s boyfriend has it, and no reputable lawyer is going to bother with this. As others have noted, you should move on. Purchase a similar cabinet; you will spend far less on an 1815 piece than you would have on a lawyer, even if you could find one to take this on.

Fawnby Jun 2023
Antiques sometimes aren’t worth as much money as we expect them to be.

As for sentimental value, is it worth the anguish of getting involved with the court system? You might not get them even then. Lawyers in my area cost $500 an hour when they have to litigate. That’s a lot of money for a china cabinet, handwritten letters and other old stuff that you’d then have to move, find a place to put, and do what with?
Krista413 Jun 2023
This can be hard for people to swallow. When my dad passed and Mom moved with me to follow my job, she had hoped to get a good amount for the houseful of antiques she'd amassed over the decades. After selling some of it bit by bit, she finally called a couple of antique dealers who flat out told her that no one buy antiques like they used to. She ended up getting only a fraction of what she'd hoped to and I think half of that was because they felt sorry for her. Antiques are only worth what someone will pay for them. I have kept a couple of items that are useful, my sisters didn't want any of it, so yeah. I'm not sentimental about any of it.
Lolaloud Jun 2023
Most of the antiques go back to like 1815 yes I’m the same person about the conservatorship about my aunt’s boyfriend he has no legal right to the antiques it was bought up Friday I guess they are apart of my heritage I like to see them again.We did it no he took all of it when he moved my aunt stated in her will that we pick out the stash we even have hand written letters from 1820s he has no use for most of the antiques

NeedHelpWithMom Jun 2023
And this is why everyone should make out a will.

JoAnn29 Jun 2023
Are u the person whose family wants you to be POA for this person?

If there was a Will, the Executor had the right to ask that those antiques be returned. If not, then a lawyer requesting them. If no return then a court order. Is Probate closed? If so may not be much you can do. If not, then its the Executor's and the lawyers responsibility to get them back.

It was the Executors responsibility to inventory Aunts belongings. Executors responsibility to be there when BF moved out to insure he only took his belongings. Make sure BF took everything at once and then put new locks on the doors.

I guess the BF didn't have an agreement with Aunt that he could remain in the home until he left for some reason or he passed.

hereiam Jun 2023
You want to go to court.

Your aunt died 2 years ago. That's a long time ago. He probably sold them off already, used the money. And even if he still has the antiques, I doubt you'll find a lawyer who'll help you. This all happened 2 years ago. The will has already been executed. I doubt you'll get the old pictures back. If you're on bad terms with your aunt's boyfriend, I doubt he'll cooperate with anything. He'll just ignore you. And a lawyer won't help you, I think.

He might even be the one who feels very wronged, being quickly kicked out of the house.

AlvaDeer Jun 2023
I would consider this over and move on.

It is unclear whether or not you took him to court already, but if you did, I doubt you would win without excellent documentation in the form of wills and letters and without proof and pictures.

Let it go.

ADVERTISEMENT

Ask a Question

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter