Since being here (2 1/2 m) she has regressed so badly. She won’t eat, interact, is always sad or crying. Her bedsore that was practically healed when she arrived is currently at a stage 4 with new ones developing. She’s been to the hospital 2 times with 1 admission for a week for septic shock. I don’t know what else to do. Someone please help me. I also have my dad that I care for and am trying to get into a program with long term.
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Then there are Kennedy sores that present themselves when a person's body is shutting down. You may want to get Hospice to evaluate to see if its regular bed sores or Kennedy. If not Kennedy, then the NH is not turning Mom or giving her the right kind of mattress.
Bellasgirl69,
What I am going to say might not make a difference or it might make a huge impact.
When I was caring for my Husband any decision I made about his care was done with all good intentions. Decisions were made after getting as much information as I could so I could make an informed decision.
I went on the idea that as long as I made the best decision I could at the time O could rest easy at night.
You are in the same position.
The fact that mom was a main caregiver for your dad, the fact that she had a stroke and was in a coma for months...that is a LOT for a body to go through.
You say yourself that she survived against all odds.
It is possible that this has gotten to be more than her body can handle.
(Unfortunately there are statistics that confirm that many caregivers die before the person they are caring for)
PLEASE do not think that the fact that you moved mom had anything to do with her decline.
What is happening may well have happened to her where she was before and the only thing that would be different is that she would be further away from you.
(If this makes sense.. It is possible that she is allowing herself to stop fighting because she is closer.)
I do hope that there is a Wound Specialist that is seeing her and not just the nurse at the facility.
If her doctor or the hospital has suggested Hospice it might be appropriate and Hospice will have Wound Care Nurses that will tend to her and see that she is cared for.
Again PLEASE do not think that moving her made the situation worse.
((hugs))
(Ventingisback)
There is a personal element here that caretakers forget about when dealing with the elderly, feeling safe and trusting the people around them. When you moved her you disrupted her life, took away her comfort zone.
Can you move her back to her old home? What does she want?
Sorry about this, but one thing I find here is that caregivers do not do much homework before deciding how to care for someone who needs care to the point that they think everything will be a bed of roses, it is not easy and snap decisions are not the answer.
I wish you the best!