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Tajann Asked September 2023

What happens if mom runs out of funds at private AL before qualifying for Medicaid assistance? Does she get discharged to family?

I am getting paperwork together for Medicaid waiver and needed bank statements. Shockingly found out mom's oldest daughter and granddaughter had been stealing funds out of her bank account when she was staying with them out of state for a few months. Funds were taken out through a forged check and taking debit to an ATM. Mom says she would "occasionally" hand over her debit when they need food. I found out almost 7,000 was withdrawn in less than 5 months from a local ATM. Mom does not want to pursue charges as she said it is her family and the money is gone so what difference does it make. Now she does not have the funds available to hold her over at current private pay AL until Medicaid waiver is processed. When granddaughter brought her in from out of state, this was the only AL facility who had an apartment open. Mom and I also thought she had more funds. I am meeting with an elder law attorney this week and hoping he can help her.

igloo572 Sep 2023
If it really truly is only $7K, I’d ask the atty to send a certified letter to Sissy to try to get her to send you a check for the money. Basically a 10 day demand letter. Do you think that would do it?

Mom doesn’t have the $, that’s why she’s filing for LTC Medicaid waiver.
But do you have the money to write a check for the AL bill or ability to put this on a credit card? Because the AL bill is going to have to be paid one way or another. I think you best off doing this and NOT causing any issues for moms Medicaid waiver application. AL placement has way less safeguards as the AL can discharge her “to the street” “to a shelter”. It is not a NH so does not have the requirement for a safe and secure environment that a skilled nursing facility has for a mandatory “like 2 like” placement. The ALs rarely do that as it’s bad public relations but they will call EMS and send her off to the ER and then refuse to take her back. & then can bill storage for her clothing, tv, etc Really you don’t want to go there if you can help it.

Also I would highly suggest that you asap run a credit check from the big 3 on mom. Like do it now online. Just to make sure that happy hands niece did not open up a credit card or do any other borrowing using grannies SS# & credit history while your mom was living in an other state with your Sister and her family. You want this search done before you meet with the attorney. Cause if there was other stuff done, it changes the whole trajectory of this drama. & post an update, ok!
Tajann Sep 2023
Mom has enough funds to pay AL through end of September. Family who stole do not have money so there is no money to pay mom back. I already reported to social security regarding possible identity theft.
AlvaDeer Sep 2023
This may be considered gifting. This needs to be reported as Elder Abuse and theft with the evidence you have and there MUST BE police reports. That will be the only way that Medicaid won't likely consider this gifting.

As to what happens? In your particular facility it is time for a face-to-face and heart-to-heart talk about all the particulars in this case. My advice would be NEVER to say to ANYONE any mention of "discharge to our home". Once that happens all of THIS nightmare will look like a good dream.
Tajann Sep 2023
I have discussed the particulars with the executive director at her current AL. Waiting to see what happens with the rest of the Medicaid process.

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CTTN55 Sep 2023
Yes, consult an elder attorney. If there ends up being a Medicaid penalty period because of this, don't you be the one to take your mother home or return the missing money. Put it on Mom's oldest daughter's shoulders to either repay the money or take her mother in.
Tajann Sep 2023
She cannot go back with sister. I had mom removed from sisters home (800 miles away) in June and placed in AL because mom called crying and said she doesn't feel safe living with her. No physical harm was done but definitely emotional.
MargaretMcKen Sep 2023
It might be worth checking what changes if M pursues the theft of her funds. It wasn’t a gift or a deliberate ‘spend down’. This may affect when the Medicaid waiver cuts in, which is an answer to “the money is gone so what difference does it make”, though you still have to cope with “it’s family”. And it is not unknown for money to magically re-appear when prosecutions are imminent.

I hope that your legal appointment can deal with all this. Best wishes, Margaret

lkdrymom Sep 2023
Then ask mom how she expects to cover her costs of the AL facility if she will not pursue charges. She doesn't want to do anything unpleasant, but she sure has no problem dumping her problems in your lap.

Grandma1954 Sep 2023
Mom may not want to pursue charges but this may prevent her from Medicaid for maybe 5 years. This would be considered a "gift". You might not have any choice but to go after the funds.
I also hope that this particular facility accepts Medicaid or you will have to look for another place and many/most places want "Private Pay" for sometimes 2 to 3 years before Medicaid kicks in.

Is anyone POA for Finances?
Is mom competent?
Tajann Sep 2023
Mom is competent, I am her POA as of last week when we met with attorney.
MACinCT Sep 2023
There may be a penalty of no payment for a couple of months. Wait for the lawyer response. Perhaps you can "suggest" to sister that she will have to take care of mom 24/7 for the time of no coverage. My response is just to scare her into knowing the consequences.
And yes you can file a police report on behalf of mom. She does not need to do it. When I filed on behalf of my mom and her boyfriend who was being scammed, the police reports came to me, the filer
Tajann Sep 2023
Her oldest daughter does not have money to pay back. Mom would never go back to stay with her and her daughter knows that.
JoAnn29 Sep 2023
Your Mom is going to need to file charges on the stolen money. There has to be a police report out there. Her rent, there should have been a contract written up, witnessed and notarized maybe even by a lawyer. Not sure if Moms word is good enough that it was for rent.

I just edited my post. I saw by your last one you are planning on sending Mom to a facility that takes Medicaid. So making any deals with the AL is not really on the table. So yes, they can ask Mom to leave if she can't pay. So, its either you paying for her care in the AL or taking her home with you. This is a good question for the lawyer. Can Mom be placed in a facility with medicaid pending? For me, Mom had 20k. She was going from an AL to LTC. I placed her in LTC and she paid for May and June. I started the Medicaid application in April so facility aware that Mom was going on Medicaid. I got all the paperwork to the caseworker by June and Medicaid started July1st. Better you place them when they have money then when they don't.

Good thing ur seeing an Elder Lawyer, good luck.
Tajann Sep 2023
Mom made it very clear she will not pursue charges against family.
janicemeyer18 Sep 2023
Your last line is critical and most important....that you "are meeting with an Elder Law Attorney". Do not miss nor delay this appointment!

WearyJanie Sep 2023
I think that if your mom’s mind is still very good, you might have a frank discussion about what hard things will happen next. The theft needs to be dealt with. Then an attorney, not mom, confronts sister. If mom won’t agree to this, you will need to take the reins, as people above have posted.

Not pursuing charges against family sounds all well and good until you have to deal with the severe consequences for doing so. They ripped mom off. They are trash. Perhaps a good talk about what happens next to mom because of the trash sister will wake mom up. But I am sure mom is feeling like a victim already, and just wants it to go away.

I agree the threat of prosecution may be enough to get some repayment. Again, if mom can shift the blame for a lawsuit onto the lawyer and Medicaid, and essentially be able to say there was nothing she could do, it might be easier for her to agree to prosecution.

Mom is no no doubt counting on your goodness and strong sense of responsibility, and is counting on you taking her in. You may need to—but be careful. Best of luck!
Tajann Sep 2023
Elder law attorneys do not handle criminal law. At least mine doesn't.
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