Mom passed 8/1/22 will stated share alike me executor 2 brothers and 1 sister. As executor of mom’s estate I got to pay funeral bill (over $10,000) and taxes, utilities and maintain mom’s house out of my retirement money until receiving fiduciary letter form Probate Court which I received 12/20/22 and opened Estate Account with bank! During this time before letter sister slowly emptied house and our agreement was to let her family go thru estate and get whatever month of Sept, and Oct 1 my family would go thru! Oct 1 house emptied except for items in basement and items in garage! I changed locks and garage door code! Oct 2 Locks changed on me and garage door broken into breaking chain and basement emptied. Police called (civil matter), lawyer called stated we will file paperwork to return property Oct 17. All a shame Dec 20 received letter! Called attorney he stated sell house and move on what's items worth a couple hundred dollars? Court does not want to hear family feuds! Mom’s will stated share? Why have a will? Courts are behind he stated! When I went to attorney’s office to finalize estate he questioned me on $3.54 missing in estate checking (Laughable) (Oh bank said checks where free but they charged me $3.54) I stated you can steal everything in house and Executor Accountable for $3.54? SAD! Lawyer charged over $11,000 to email forms to Probate Court because Estate was over $50,000 yes over $50 thousand you need attorney check your State! Call your Senator, Assembly like I did to Raise Decades old Laws! Get Government (Lawyers) out of my Business! Sister didn't end here stay tuned! Part 2: sister is executor of aunt (mom’s sister)
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Before creating a trust, which costs money up front, find out what probate situation is in your state. (Lawyers love trusts because of the upfront money, according to my BIL and best friend, both lawyers.)
The police in your area sound incompetent.
If it’s the latter, this morphs into a much bigger issues as Sissy would be a tenant, not a squatter or trespasser. If Sissy is a tenant then the OP would have to go through however NyS does evictions and pay for the costs to do an eviction and then show at the hearings that it’s justified. If it’s family drama, judge can toss it out. In my area, eviction takes at least 6 months if not more. Really hard to evict a tenant.
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My neighbor did the best thing when they broke up her Moms home before the house sold. The family got together and each person picked an items they wanted. She then put a sticky, with their name, on the item they wanted. I guess if 2 people wanted the same thing, it was discussed. Then each person left with the item with their sticky on it.
So sorry you went thru this. TG my Mom didn't have much. I was cleaning out her home before she passed. I don't think my brothers knew about her cultured pearls Dad bought her years before. My daughter, her oldest and closest grandchild, got them. (I am the oldest and only daughter) That was probably the only thing worth anything that she had.
And I will be frank with you that for me it wouldn't be worth it.
I would not serve as executor in such a matter and would resign the position. THEN let the lawyer gobble up the whole estate, which he or she will happily do.
I would not be up for this kind of worry and argument, but that's just me. I would leave it to the other heirs and move on.
Lesson here for everyone, your parents' houses should be put into revocable trusts so that you avoid lengthy probate.
My parents' planning for their old age was an epic fail, but at least they did that.