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EddieK Asked November 26, 2023

Eating disorder.

Is eating disorder a common issue with memory loss? My wife is in early stages of a not-yet fully diagnosed cognitive disorder of executive function. Doctor appointments are few and far between, other than urgent care visits for concerns that turn out to be false alarms. Over the last two months the food she will eat has dropped to almost nothing because of aversion to food's color, smell, texture, flavor, temperature, age and origin. She is formerly a "foodie".

NeedHelpWithMom Nov 28, 2023
I have seen this go both ways.

My mother did rehab in a nursing home. Several of the permanent residents had some form of dementia. Some had to be encouraged to eat. Food was never on their minds.

Other residents forgot that they had already eaten. They would line up by the reception desk. The receptionist would give them a sandwich when they were truly hungry. After that they got cookies.

I saw the receptionist tell a man that he had a full dinner, a turkey sandwich and a cookie and he still wanted something to eat. He was an average sized man. He wasn’t a big guy who looked like he could eat a lot of food.

OncehatedDIL Nov 28, 2023
My MIL developed anorexia when her vascular dementia was causing weight loss, her mental illness issues may have played a role. She loved the weight loss and took great pride when people commented on how thin she had become.

Interestingly enough, my son, also with mental illness, has developed anorexia with his cancer.

Both had never had anorexia before, so it is possible to have an eating disorder develop in such situations.
Isthisrealyreal Nov 28, 2023
Once, May The Lord touch your son and heal his body.

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KNance72 Nov 27, 2023
my Mom could Not taste or smell and she did Not want to eat. They No Longer taste things and food is No longer Pleasurable .

AlvaDeer Nov 27, 2023
Yes, problems with eating in both perception, likes/dislikes may change radically.
Not only that, but swallow may be affected and eating can become almost uncomfortable for some.

Grandma1954 Nov 27, 2023
Are there things that she will eat or drink without a problem?
If so focus on those for now.
Has she lost weight because of this?
Has she had other problems due to not eating? Like getting dizzy, sleeping more, problems with heart rate or blood pressure, headaches, depression, agitation, feeling cold
If she "helps" prepare a meal is she more apt to eat? If so have her help peel potatoes, stir soup. See if she will "taste test" while you are making a meal.
If she still refuses then I would say this would be a concern and it would be worth a call/visit to the doctor that would not be a false alarm. I am sure that they check her weight and BP at each visit and if they see a marked weight loss there might be a diagnosis of "failure to thrive". This might be a condition that would result in a referral to Hospice.

I do see that you responded with the info that your wife has COVID that can very much effect taste for quite some time after. If that is the cause then trying to focus on what she does like and will eat just to keep her calorie intake up would be ideal.
EddieK Nov 27, 2023
I'm pretty sure we're not at the hospice level. But there are definitely mental health issues at play. The psychiatrist, neurologist, family doctor, etc. are not a "team" and I think that's a core issue. We need a team approach. I am praying this emerges soon.

She has everything you described except high blood pressure. Yes, dizzy, headaches, sleeping LESS, weight loss (not profound), depression, unable to get warm. Many many doctor visits for all of these. Her sense of hopelessness is palatable, and I encourage her each day, maintaining a balance of hope, but without being patronizing. She's fiercely independent and does not like to be told that something is other than what she has already self-diagnosed what it is. For example a recent Urgent visit for "pancreatitis" turned out to be indigestion.

She won't prepare any food. She will make her own smoothies, so she gets that on her own, once a day. She can't find anything in the kitchen, so we need to simplify. Simplification is a lot of work!
sounhappy Nov 27, 2023
1 technique I use, is tell my relative how many more spoons. Then she has a goal in her head.

“10 more spoons”, I say, as I feed her. I count. She knows it’ll come to an end at 10 (she really doesn’t like to eat).
MAYDAY Nov 27, 2023
And if she complains in the middle of a spoon counting, just throw your hands up and say ,
”great! I lost count, now we need to start over..!”
🤗🎉🥰🤗
MAYDAY Nov 26, 2023
Greek yogurt is good.. it’s not too thick. If she has had a swallow test, then you can thin it out with a bit of milk, juice, or water.. you can mix ensure into it to make it different consistency, liquidy.. experiment with it and try..
more soupy may be a better word …
its hard to keep these bodies going sometimes.
I know sometimes the brain will crave sugar/calories. …
Just try different things.. something might stick, and then the next day… forget it… that stuff is horrible!!!
Not fun…

MAYDAY Nov 26, 2023
Ask her what she likes.. at this point..
bake a yam or sweet potato..
maybe keep things simple.
A one item meal..
grilled cheese sandwich ?

ask her what her favorite food was when she was a kid; and tell yours.. make a conversation.,

what you two did not like as a kid, but learned to tolerate it or worse.. Like it!!!

And include other topics so as to not just talk about one thing.
Music, movies, tv shows, games, toys, travel, camping , school, classes, subjects, art, teachers, classmates, sports-PE…
sorry you are going through this, it’s hard..

MAYDAY Nov 26, 2023
seeing too much food can be turnoff .. not for me.. :/

protein shakes..

ice, frozen fruit blueberries, strawberries.. Trader Joe’s has mixtures;, some frozen peas.. not much..ensure, and I add a tablespoon oh whey powder too..
blend it..
if she likes a banana.. add it.. no wrong creating something fun to eat.
Another friend sent me muscle milk.. chocolate.. it tasted great in the shake.
NeedHelpWithMom Nov 26, 2023
I agree. If I made food served on a dinner plate my mom would say, “That’s too much food!” I started serving food on lunch sized plates.
NeedHelpWithMom Nov 26, 2023
My mom was skin and bones because she claimed that she wasn’t hungry. Her clothes started falling off of her.

I made smoothies often for her. She seemed to enjoy drinking more than actually eating.

My grandmother lost her appetite when she got older. Some older people don’t want to eat a whole lot. My grandmother was happy with a boiled egg and one piece of toast for her dinner. Possibly a cup of soup for lunch.

Mom and grandma were excellent cooks in their younger years.

Msblcb Nov 26, 2023
As my mom declined she lost the taste for things she had always loved. She was a vegetarian but began to dislike all her favorite dishes. I think, in her case, she could not swallow easily. We did give her an appetite enhancer but it did not have the impact we had hoped. I tried new foods that she historically did not like and some of those worked.

I did forget about whether the food was healthy. She was 93 and I was focused on getting calories in her. She loved sweets.

I would try new items to see if they work. Try different textures, drinks with calories. Mom liked Ensure juice. I had read that a colored plate helps them see their food better. I bought red plates and made sure the portions were small as to not overwhelm her.

You may want to speak with your doctor about a med to increase her appetite. While it did not work for me, some folks on this forum have had good results.

I wish you success. It is very hard to watch your loved one refuse to eat.

lealonnie1 Nov 26, 2023
Hi Eddie. A poor appetite and loss of interest in food is common with the dementias. You'll have to figure out which colors, textures and flavors appeal to your wife now and offer her small portions of food 6x a day at least. Don't be surprised if she begins to prefer sweets.....thats What normally happens. Don't rely on her doctor for much of anything......they use guesswork more than any other "scientific" evidential based or useful info for caregivers. We learn more from one another than we do from doctors who are still scratching their heads about brain disorders.


Here is a useful link to an article discussing this topic at length:

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/daily-living/poor-appetite-dementia#:~:text=A%20person%20with%20dementia%20may%20lose%20interest%20in%20food.,loss%20and%20less%20muscle%20strength.

If I recall, your wife is sort of fixated with healthy eating and the like, which really isn't helpful in this situation. She can likely convince herself that everything is "bad" and start withering away. I suggest you offer her a "healthful" smoothie with high calorie protein powder ( u can buy on Amazon) with a banana and frozen berries (good antioxidants) and anything else you can think to throw into the blender like flax seed and Greek yoghurt. She may like such a thing, it's worth a try. Experiment. Maybe she likes crunchy food this week and pastas next week.


Best of luck.
anonymous1732518 Nov 26, 2023
Isn't Greek yogurt thick?
sounhappy Nov 26, 2023
I’ve seen this happen.

People can lose their appetite for a lot of reasons. Sometimes it’s the side-effect of medicines, or losing sense of taste, or getting a metallic sense of taste, or stomach problems, or pain after eating…

My relative must be forced (strongly encouraged). After eating, she’s always happy she did; feels better with food in her stomach.

Every case is different.

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