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jujubee2222 Asked January 13, 2024

What's the next place for my dad?

My dad will be 90 next month! He was born with a severe hearing loss and has been a lip reader most of his life. He is now losing his vision, so can no longer lip read or see letters on a white board. Communication has been difficult, but we are managing. We are now using 8.5 x 11 pages of individual letters to spell out words. It is working for now, just time consuming.


Now that he has very limited vision, I fear he is a fall risk in his 1 bedroom apartment. He actually got lost in his apartment because he could not decipher where he was in it. He lives in a senior living enhanced facility with assistance. A requirement of residency is that he needs to be able to get from his apartment to the dining area unassisted. He has been successful in doing so but tells me it's a miracle he is able to do it.


He really needs navigation assistance (which is not provided) in addition to having someone cut his food (is provided) and help him with knowing where his cup is in relation to his plate, etc.... He has knocked over things on the table because he cannot see them.


I feel he needs more care than he is receiving, but what is next? I don't feel he's ready for a nursing home, but would he even qualify for nursing home care based on his needs and hearing/vision disabilities? I'm having difficulty finding what the criteria is/are.


We are in NY State. Unfortunately, moving in with family is not an option due to working full time and our homes have stairs he cannot do.


Any advice or information would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.

Fawnby Jan 14, 2024
Contact services for the blind in his area.

AlvaDeer Jan 14, 2024
It is time for the POA to meet with the facility administration to discuss what things might be available and what assistive devices might be available for your Dad. You should reach out to Council on Aging in your area also. There may be things to help Dad stay in place and there may be programs available to him due to his "legally blind" status.
The adminisration can also help you with next best steps for your Dad and hopefully with planning or may guide you in ways to seek help with that planning.

I certainly wish your Dad the best.

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againx100 Jan 14, 2024
I would reach out to some AL and SNF to see if he would qualify for them. Different facilities can have different rules.

This situation has got to be so very difficult. Check with the local Lions Club - they usually have services for hearing and sight impaired.

JoAnn29 Jan 13, 2024
There should be a Disabilities Dept in his County. It would not hurt to see if someone can come in and help him organize his apt to be easier to get around. Too bad he never learned to sign. The ABCs can be done in the palm of his hand. Yes, u would need to learn it too. What needs to be remembered is everything has a place and they go back to that place.

If he can afford it, an Assisted Living would be a good choice.

ChoppedLiver Jan 13, 2024
You pose an interesting dilemma.

While your Dad is still sound in the mind and can barely read, make sure that all his papers are up to date with his wishes, especially the Medical Directive and POLST.

I would reach out to a non-profit for the vision impaired and see what assistance they give you.

I think your Dad will have to move, unless the facility has another plan that can provide assistance to your Dad for dinner, or can bring the dinner to him. For now, maybe you can hire a part time caregiver to help him do all the things a seeing person can do.

Its going to be rough on him.....and you!

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