Learning? Here is my story. Ours...

My wife has early onset Alz. She was bi-lingual but stopped speaking english about 3 yrs ago. I do not speak her language either. For my own mental health I pretend she understands my questions and I try to interpret her response. Oddly it has been working out. We do not use any prescription medications. We did at first but it was obvious they were of no value. It is always bull answer starting with "it should.." or "we have found..". I had to cashout my retirement and quit work in 2017. We were not old enough to retire. We took early retirement for Social Security when we finally became old enough. As to finances we found that it was easier to suffer and payoff all we could to avoid interest. All the bills are on auto-pay and now someone else mows the grass. I did not seek SSI as I wanted to avoid as much interaction with outside forces. I'm busy enough already and can "guess" as well as they. What can they do in a nursing home that I can't? Ignore her. I do not use diapers on her which after a few spills has resulted in a habit of her holding on as long as she can until I figureout to bring her into the bathroom. She has begun this insane teeth grinding which I have learned to understand better. It seems to be primarily a form of expression. I found that it will subside once I figure out her need, She grinds when trying to hold her bladder, is hungry or thirsty, has an itch and so on. Or arthritis. By the way, if any clothing say like a blouse has a fold or wrinkle on the backsid try to straighten it out as this can be a source of itchiness. Kind of like when the bed sheets get bunched up. She no longer will lay down to sleep so the couch is her new home. I had to learn that things that need to be done for peace are; remove all glass pictures, mirrors or other reflection providers as they are confusing to her. I had to replace the shower head (noisy) with one of those wand types on a hose, The most benefit comes from being able to recognize comfort points such as body support for back or legs when sitting. She will NOT ADJUST herself for comfort. One really great thing is I found that she will mimic me which I found can control her mood. If I raise my eyebrows and smile OR LAUGH she does too and seems to be actually happy for a while. Laughter is a great tool. I have also found that liquid Tyenol daily (about 500-750 mg twice a day or can skip a day) has been very helpful in providing some comfort which inturn makes peace. When it comes to bathing and brushing teeth I find routine is very very important. We take a shower everyday but to avoid dry skin we use soap only twice a week. When she is on the toilet this makes her my prisoner. I then brush her teeth and/or give her chewable vitamins. Cranberry chewables to help avoid UTI's. Sometimes she goes along and other times she does not. I found out from a dental hygenist that it is better when you do not rinse out the toothpaste so its properties can work. I use a very small amount of paste for cavity fighting or whatever but it is left in her mouth. She started spitting it while sitting there. At some point I found the right amount to leave in which did not result in spitting. I have to assist with walking. If she should suddenly decide she wants to drop to the floor I have my right wrist under her armpit while using the same hand to hold her arm to keep from grabbing things to pull down. I found that when she is too heavy to hold up, I can then bend one knee behind her to stop further dropping. Eating...calories are easy to keep, it is protein that is tougher. We eat twice a day, morning is two jumbo eggs scrambled with two slice american cheese which accounts for about 26 grams of protein which is half of the daily needed for heart and all other muscles. We all get grumpy sometimes. Her too. I don't jump and try to solve everything without allowing a little time to pass first. 15 to 20 minutes later whatever was the problem is gone. Anyone have any other good coping info?