Dad falls a lot in memory care. Do I need to meet him at ER every time EMS takes him to be checked?

I cannot drive at night. I used to call the ER when I determined that she got there and evaluated, to give them my situation and to call me when it was time to discharge

I'm the forum member who's mother fell 50x while living in Memory Care Assisted Living. She was never sent to the ER for any of her falls because the nurse on duty determined she was unhurt and had no head injuries. The times she was sent to the ER were all valid reasons and I met the ambulance at the hospital each time. Mom wasn't able to coherently speak for herself, so how else would the hospital staff know what was going on w/o me there as her mouthpiece? And advocate. Plus she'd have been scared to death all alone because no, staff from MC do not accompany residents to the hospital.

I think you need to speak with the facility about not sending dad to the ER for every middle of the night fall he takes. How do THEY know he's hit his head unless a knot shows up or he's bleeding?? Not only are these trips to the ER stressful for you, but they are discombobulating and upsetting for dad, no doubt!

The other thing you may want to do is get his PCP to order a hospice evaluation for dad. I can't tell you the relief I felt when hospice accepted mom and the hospital became a thing of the past. All that stress was over with, finally. They never DID anything for her any way, except poke and prod and stab her, only to determine she was okay and send her back to MC after 6 hours of torture.

Best of luck to you.

My father went to the ER so many times, I felt like I lived there. Then I realized I don't have to go. If he fell at AL they would send him and have to call me. I told them to book a medical transport back for him (at $75 a pop). If he was admitted then I would go after work the next day. There was no way I could have kept my job if I attended every 2am trip to the ER with him.

No, you do not need to go each time.
They must have him go for check up esp if he has hit head or face area or something appears to be broken. But that will be an EMS trip to ER, scans or xrays and stitches if needed, and a quick return home. There is nothing you can do there unless it is looking like an admission. As that the hospital contact you after ER visits.

No one goes with him so since he has Dementia, I would be there.

If you don't go... who advocates for him at the ER? Does a staff member stay with him the entire time there? I'm asking out of ignorance, since I haven't had this happen to me. My 94-yr old Mom lives next door to me and she's had a few ER visits in the past 3 years...

At some point a fall is probably going to lead to a fatality, like it did for my 100-yr old Aunt with advanced dementia who passed away last year after a fall in her home. She really couldn't walk unassisted but one night shimmied past the barriers and fell, breaking her hip. She didn't pass right away: she passed in rehab (we think due to a clot).

Your Dad is going to continue to fall as long as he thinks he has mobility. You have to decide if there's a trigger for you to go to the hospital (like, is there blood? Is something broken? Is he conscious? How bruised is he?)

If he has a DNR or other order to not use excessive efforts to treat him, then he will stay in the hospital until LTC or hospice is arranged.

There is a participant on this forum whose Mom fell 50+ times in MC. If my Aunt hadn't passed away, I'm sure she'd still be attempting to get out beds or chairs, and falling.

The facility needs to put his mattress on the floor and employ other strategies to prevent him from getting out of chairs, like an alarm (which my Aunt wore during the day while she was in her recliner).

No, you don’t and you shouldn’t.

I always went for my LO when she was in Memory Care, because I never realized there was any other option. I was her responsible party, Healthcare POA, etc. I gave them her history, meds, etc., Plus, she was always so scared while in the ER. She really clung to me when there and needed constant reassurance.. I would’ve just fretted over what was going on, if I hadn’t gone. But, that’s mainly due to how scared of hospitals she was. One time, she was taken to the ER late at night and the Facility didn’t notify me! A doctor at the ER called me though and we got things straight.

Everyone is different though. It might be that it’s not necessary. It’s not possible for patients whose family members live too far away, So, it is possible.

What does he think you should do, assuming that you discussed this sort of thing at some point? If I were you, I'd handle it on a case-by-case basis. Let your conscience be your guide.