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Betsysue2002 Asked March 24, 2024

Getting ready for death or permanent nursing home.

My husband had a blood clot extending from lung to lung. It almost completely filled his artery.


 


he had no symptoms till he passed out in the hall about 5 am on his way to the bathroom.


 


after i came home after he had it removed and was in icu, i realized that both of us need to be ready for the inevitable.


 


we have long term insurance.


 


other than the usual paperwork what would be some things to plan to do ?


 


ive mainly thought of three piles for objects … toss, save, discard.


 


other than those two things … paperwork and objects … im stuck.


 


any suggestions ?

MeDolly Mar 25, 2024
I you have not already done this, it is time to make sure that his Will, DPOA and if wanted a DNR is in place.

So sorry about this, don't forget to take care of you.

NeedHelpWithMom Mar 25, 2024
You have received excellent advice so I won’t repeat it. Just stopped by to say how sorry I am and that I will be thinking of you and will say a prayer for you and your husband.

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Fawnby Mar 24, 2024
I'm very sorry for your situation. Since you are realistic about it, this might be a good time to choose a funeral home. They'll make it easy for you; just call and explain. They'll have advice, and if you wish, they'll meet you at your house to discuss it so you don't have to go to their office. They have checklists of things that you should be doing.

It gives great peace of mind to have matters settled so that in the midst of the grief of a passing, we've already made important decisions and don't have to worry about it.

My best wishes as you deal with these difficulties.

MidwestOT Mar 24, 2024
Hopefully this has already happened, but please make sure the hospital has any advanced directives and a “do not resuscitate” order if that would be his wish. I’m so sorry this has happened; please remember to take care of yourself by drinking water, eating a little and grabbing rest when you can(not easy I know).

AlvaDeer Mar 24, 2024
Your husband is clearly now in the hospital.
Please seek the help of the social worker for this unit at once.
I am surprised, quite honestly, that hasn't been offered to you at once.

First of all, there is little you can do right now.
Your husband is currently in a life and death situation. If he lives he is going to need help ongoing and he will be in care in a rehab, SNF or other facility for some time. This isn't going to be a case of his coming home tomorrow.

Right now you cannot even begin to guess at what you need and what you need to access.
If you are, when home, restless and worried, do go through all your files and gather together your important legal documents, including that for LTC insurance. Try to have a coherent idea how to put your hands on things. Other than that it is to keep bills current, gather around you any and all support you can find for suggestions.

I wish you the best. No putting the cart before the horse right now. Stay mindful and in THIS day, and hope and pray. My very best wishes going out to you.

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