My 91-year-old mom is in a nursing home that she does not like. I took her to an endocrinologist today and she said the nursing home is not drawing blood and sending it to her like they should. My mother is losing weight because of her thyroid. She says the issue has been the same since last year. I was wondering if I transfer her to another nursing home, will she get better care? She wants to leave the nursing home she is in now and I agree with her. I have 3 siblings that I need to consult with what I am planning. I am the only one who really takes her to doctor appointments. My mother doesn’t get along with too many people. She says whatever is on her mind.
10 Answers
Helpful Newest
First Oldest
First
Good luck finding a suitable home for your mom.
ADVERTISEMENT
...but your profile says she has ALZ/dementia, so how do you know what she's telling you is accurate?
Before you do anything I would fact check with her doctors and the DON. Who is her MPoA or Medical Representative? This is the person who needs to be verifying all of this and involved in the decision-making.
I have experience with this. Rude Aunt wanted me to write down everything that happened every day with my dad, who had cancer, dementia and was dying. I was his caregiver, and she refused to provide any and all help. Taking care of a patient with those issues was exhausting, and there was no time to keep a log for HER. Also, he didn't want her involved. I had another experience where I was looking after a family member and wrote a daily email to their adult kids about progress being made. Not one ever thanked me or offered to help.
Keep others out of it. I'm sure you can handle all of it very well without stirring up a bunch of people who are likely to find fault no matter what you and mom decide to do for her.
Thyroid condition does require blood draws to monitor effect of medications, but at 91 you can expect the beginning of times when you are facing end of life and there are not a whole lot of perfect answers to anything. It is just the fact of life. And death.
I sure wish you the best. I would do all I can not to disrupt the life of a 91 year old who may not be happy in new environment any more than in current one. This time of loss upon loss is not about happiness and even contentment would be a reach. I wish you the very best, and hope things will work out, but I would speak with administration before a move and I would have as realistic attitude to all this as I can muster.
Of course you should find the best nursing home possible for your mom, but don’t assume that everything will get done somewhere else without supervision or intervention. Sadly, I think that’s just the way it is. Good luck to you.
I moved my mother in September of 2022. She passed in April of 2023. I was so glad I was able to move her and there was a great difference between the two.