Sister's dementia.

How can a son tell his 92 yo mother she's ok when she can't even bathe or dress herself and sleeps 22 hours a day, suffering from what's likely end stage dementia? Oh wait. Let me guess. The Almighty Inheritance.

I truly hope your sister has left all of her money to the Humane Society.

I would call APS to do a wellness check on her. By participating in her care you are allowing the son to say "I thought her bro and SIL were caring for her; that's what she told me".
Clearly, at this advanced age and in a condition where she cannot dress nor feed herself she should now be in care.

I would call APS. In absence of APS in your area I would write her doctor and ask what authorities should be informed that she is for the most part home alone without care.

In the current circumstances she may die in her own home. In the current circumstance who is to say that isn't what she would PREFER over another few years in a facility. However, it isn't something you can allow to go on. It is on the face of it neglect.

If you are afraid of SIL I would tell him that you are not to be put down as the reporter. However, the fact is that he is neglecting this woman who is in need of care, so whether or not he is upset should not be your first concern I am thinking, as regards your Sister?

Have you contacted her APS in her location for a wellness check? Express your concerns . Even if they currently cannot do anything for her, it starts a record. Does she have a doctor that you can contact the office to make them aware of your concerns. You can report but do not expect a call back because of HIPPA.

You could ask the police to do a wellness check. That might shake things up with her son.

Or you could report the situation to APS and they will do an investigation.

I am sorry that she isn’t in a facility where she would receive care.

Wishing you all the best.