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Carribear0111 Asked May 21, 2024

Suggestions on mom who isn't eating, because her hallucinations (kids) aren’t eating?

My mom has lewy body dementia and suffers from hallucinations. The hallucinations are kids and she makes meals for them. My mom then gets upset because the kids (hallucinations) arent eating and throws all the food away. My mom doesn’t want to eat because the kids aren’t eating. Has anyone else dealt with this and if so, any suggestions on how to get her to eat?

Taarna Jun 12, 2024
Stop asking her to eat "meals" but offer her plenty of nutritious "snacks."

KNance72 Jun 1, 2024
My Mom Lost strength In her hands and then started eating Yoghurt - her stove had been shut Off . She kept saying " she had No food " but there was a ton of food In the fridge and freezer . She Lost her ability to taste and smell and stopped eating and was never Hungry . Got down to 93 Pounds .
NeedHelpWithMom Jun 1, 2024
My mom lost her appetite as she aged. She ate a bite here and there, but claimed that she was never hungry.

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FamilyNeeded Jun 1, 2024
Have you ever had your mom tested for a Urinary Infection? I know it may sound strange, but especially in older adults, the infection can cause confusion and is often misdiagnosed as dementia. I would also check the drugs she is on. The side effects can cause many issues there as well ...including hallucinations.
NeedHelpWithMom Jun 1, 2024
This is one of the things that I learned from the forum. I had no idea that UTIs affected the elderly differently.

I wish doctors would address these issues with their patients and their caregivers.

I was a strong advocate for my mom. She lived with us and I went to all of her doctor appointments.

I asked Mom’s doctors questions, but there is always something new to learn.

It is important to discuss these topics with people who are new to the forum.
Fawnby Jun 1, 2024
Play along. The kids ate all their food while she was napping. They went to a friend's for dinner and will be back later. The kids are bringing takeout. The kids' doctor told them they only need to eat one meal a day and they already ate it. The kids are on a diet. The kids are on vacation. The kids are at school, they eat at the cafeteria there. I'm sure you can think of others! Your mom won't remember what you last told her the kids did, so maybe you can tell her only one or two of the above over and over.

A caregiver in a very nice memory care facility told me some time ago that in order to get the residents to do what they have to do, they lie, lie, lie. It's better to tell them something they'll accept - like doctor wants them to shower today - in order to achieve the goal that keeps them safe, clean and healthy. I've grown to understand the wisdom of that!

If your mom is living alone, she shouldn't be.

NeedHelpWithMom Jun 1, 2024
Mom had Parkinson’s disease. Shortly before she died she started experiencing seeing things. She claimed that a child was visiting her.

My mother was comforted by this child who told her that she would be with her until the end.

Your mom’s situation sounds different from my mother’s visions.

Firstof5 May 26, 2024
Not an expert here, but could you try humoring her and pretend the kids are real? You could suggest that she should show the "kids" that the food is good, by eating it in front of them?

Llamalover47 May 25, 2024
Carribear0111: As she unfortunately suffers from dementia, her brain lacks the capacity for logical thought processes. As you live 2.5 hours away from her, perhaps you can set up a meal delivery service. It is imperative that she eat.

Anxietynacy May 21, 2024
I'm wondering if your mom has lost her appetite in general and this is how her hallucinations are dealing with it?

I'm not sure if that's possible or not but it's a thought.

Kind of like you dream you broke your arm and wake up and you have been sleeping on your arm for so long you lost the feeling in it.

So sorry you are going through that, it's got to be so hard

AlvaDeer May 21, 2024
I have, yes, dealt with Lewy's hallucinations.
They are VERY real. My brother could describe whole garden parties and the participants right down to their ducktail black Elvis-like haircut, white shorts, bare chest and white towel around the neck. Right down to the immigrant woman who was huddled with her baby in the corner, and what each was wearing.
His hallucinations did not last and he was in early stages, died before he went any farther.

The fact that is when it is impossible to control hallucinations with medications (warning: some make already poor balance all that much worse) it is time for memory care placement.
I am really sorry.
Falls under the category that not everything has a "fix".

funkygrandma59 May 21, 2024
Have her doctor prescribe medication for her hallucinations. There are several out there and they do help, so I would start there.
And until she gets on them you can make sure she's drinking the high calorie Ensures, so she's at least taking in something.
CaringWifeAZ Jun 1, 2024
I was going to recommend the same - try to get her to drink nutrition drinks. But I would make a smoothie out of it, or put it in a cup with a lid and straw. She might be resistant to drinking a "meal replacement" for nutritional benefit if she knows what it is. Maybe let her think its just a yummy drink.

For my husband, I add a little strawberry gelatin, dissolved in hot water first, and mix it with vanilla boost. It tastes like a strawberry milkshake!
I use gelatin because it holds water and has collagen, both beneficial for someone who is not eating well. In fact, jello is good for elders who are not drinking enough liquid.
When mixing jello with a protein drink, a little bit goes a long way! Just one cup of dissolved jello liquid - half of what a small package makes, will flavor 12 cups of vanilla drink, without being too sweet. I mix up a large batch every morning for the day.

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