My father throws a tantrum if a nurses aide comes to stay with him so I can have 1 evening off a week. Any suggestions?

You do what you do when a child has a temper tantrum.
You ignore it.
When you leave and the caregiver takes over he will calm down.
He may not calm down right away but eventually he will get used to you leaving and another taking over for you.
It is actually a good idea if you can get a caregiver ore than 1 day a week. It gives you a break and it gets him used to another person.

Let him throw the tantrum and have one evening off a week. You deserve that.

Kids throw tantrums too when they don’t get their way . Let him cry it out .

Kids have to go to school they don’t get a choice. Kids have a babysitter when parents go out .

You go out , Dad sucks it up .
“ Too bad Dad, I’m going out , I need a night off “. Then ignore the tantrum .

I think you should do it more often . Let him get used to it more so he adjusts .
Otherwise it’s like the first time every time.

Like already said, you schedule yourself more than just one night off a week(because you deserve more than just one)with said nurses aide, and go enjoy yourself, and let your whiny father throw all the temper tantrums he's like.
And then you can throw in that if he doesn't like you having a few nights off a week, then you'll have to stop helping him all together and he can be placed in the appropriate facility, where you can get back to just being his daughter and advocate and not his burned out caregiver.

So he has a tantrum.
When you leave.

What's the report from the nurse aide afterwards? 🤔

I watched my BIL say Bye kids & leave. Kids fine. I watched my SIL looking worried, delaying, You'll be fine.. & the kids crying, pleading, their hearts breaking Don't leaveeeee! yada yada. 2 mins after SIL left, the kids are playing happily.

Seen PLENTY of elders do same.
Manipulation. (Inc my own Mother).

Put your Confident Face on & Go.

PS look up *Shadowing* behaviour

Brandee again--

schedule yourself more breaks--2-4 times a week, once a week is not enough

You ignore the outburst. I would also go with others and add another two per week for your own time. You need the break and he is with a caregiver.

Ignore it.

You leave.

Get a break.

You do as said, you give him a kiss on the cheek, a hug, a see you later, be good for the sitter and walk out the door. If competent, you tell him he is acting like a toddler. You need a night out.

What Funky Grandma said.
He can get a grip or move to AL.
You are dealing with a Senior Brat who is now a true burden.