MIL has been in memory care going on 7 months now. Of course, we have not been able to see her in person since early March I think. Every phone call ends in tears. I have a lot of prior experience with caregiving having worked in adult foster care for many years. Since we have no idea how much longer this will continue, I have been considering applying to work there.
Presently they are starting to plan for window visits on Father's Day, but no indication that this will go forward or if it's a one time thing.
I have been retired for 4 years now but am able to work just haven't wanted to.
So, has anyone else tried this as a means to see your loved one? I would be able to see her before and after work and maybe during breaks.
Anyway, thanks for any input as I think this through.
When it came time for my Mommaw to have round the clock care... I worked grave yard and my adult son moved back in with me and worked days so we could take care of her. I was so traumatized by my short time working in the facility. There were some wonderful people and excellent caregivers there, but there were some that I told myself if I ever saw them on the street, at my age now, I would still punch them in the face.
As I originally stated, I don't really want to take a job at this time.
I do know for a fact that a mother and daughter work together in this place. Also, at this time, volunteers are not allowed in.
So still considering my options.
The best thing to do is ask management at the facility. Worst case, no.
That said, during lock down they will still limit interactions, whether you work there or not, so this may not resolve the visiting issue.
If you did not want to care for her at home or could not care for her at home why would you want to care for her in a facility where you will also have to care for 10 or 15 others.
If it is a matter of you could not care for her yourself, for the cost of Memory Care you could have hired someone to help you in your home.
Same with if she needed adaptations to the house, far less expensive to make the house accessible than Memory Care.
Can you honestly say that you would not give MIL more care than others?
Can you honestly say that when she does something to "piss" you off you would be able to restrain yourself the way you might if another resident did the same thing?
There are a LOT of posts on this site about BOUNDARIES and I think this would be a difficult one to negotiate. Even if you were able to manage it would the other members of your family be able to separate you the DIL and you the employee or would they ask you to do little things for their loved one.
I would also imagine that the facility has employee guidelines about this. Even if you were able to work in the same place I would imagine you would not be assigned to the area where MIL is residing.
As for whether it is allowed, the best thing to do is ask them. Worst case, the answer is NO.
I do know one place I worked would not hire both my daughter and myself, although it was large enough there that we might never see each other during the day! We had to work at different locations. My last employment had husbands and wives working, as well as adult children, often in the same building, but likely different departments.
In one weekly update, the person (upper admin) who writes it mentioned the passing of her mother, who lived in the facility.
So, it is all dependent on each facility's rules. I doubt there is any law prohibiting this, but every place will have their own rules.
ASK!
I know one of the companies I worked for would not allow a husband and wife to work at the same center.
Don’t shoot the messenger. Review their policy regarding employment of relatives. I am sure this is addressed somewhere in the personnel manual.