I’m not in the worst situation : mom doesn’t live with us. But for the 3 years she’s in her memory care facilities, shower time once a week is a source of fighting. At the beginning I was there once a week, on Wednesday (since last summer I add one or 2 other visit), so the staff began to wait for my presence to help convince mom to accept the shower. I’ve tried over those last 3 years all the tricks and advices with no avail and much fighting. Mom even accuses me of taking sides with the the staff and not her ( that is the least wounding, she says much worse things). Now I must phone the staff if I can’t be there the Wednesday as usual (like today)!
Mom is on an antipsychotic since Marsh this year and I’m suffering from Sjogrën since my 40s, the anastrozole against recidive of breast cancer not one year ago augments the tiredness in a big way. Today I’ve just taken one hour and a half convincing mom, but the staff were too late (she was on their schedule yesterday, so today they tried to place her somewhere when I was there), so mom said no again. They will come 2 of them to shower her manu militari. It is frightening. I’m sad, tired, at my wit’s end, don’t know anymore what I could do, nor what would happen. I’m fearful and weepy.
And don't worry abut being helpful on the forum. Even sharing your experiences is helpful to others. (((((hugs))))))
Curious at the size of the shower? I remember my Dad's shower at his Assisted Living, it was the size of telephone booth. My gosh, as some elders age, they do get claustrophobic.
I’m simply on the verge of burn out, so everything is too big. Also I’m not as helpful on this forum as I could be. So sorry!
Wish you the best, don’t answer, I won’t check. Thanks anyway.