My cousin and her husband were having marital difficulties and then her mom moved in. My cousin's husband moved out and they are now divorced. I know things were far from perfect but I can't help but wonder if her mom did not move in, if things would have been different.
This is now the second case I have heard of parents moving in and spouses moving out. Is this happening more frequently as adult children are becoming care givers at an increased rate?
I chose to marry my husband, Bob (rather than another handsome fellow named John) 33 years ago because he was strong in painful situations. I was in college when my brother died at the age of 26, and it was my friend Bob who held me when I sobbed and then rocked me to sleep that night. The next morning, Bob drove back to my place from across town, helped me pack, picked up my airline tickets, withdrew $200 from his bank account so I'd have spending money, drove me to the airport and then walked me to the gate. He was also standing there when I returned.
My boyfriend, John, who was told my brother died before I heard the news, never even called me. When I called him and asked him why he bolted, he said "I didn't know what to say."
We all have acquaintances who can't handle life's lowest moments and highest hurdles. They may be great when life's a party, but they're not the best marriage material.
Bob is STILL my stalwart supporter and shield. Are we tested and tried on a daily basis having my mom living in our home? YOU BET! He retired in December. Now, in the time of our lives we thought we'd be spending weekends on the beach or traveling, we go nowhere together and feel tied down. He may mumble at times, but he's not bolting.
John, most likely, would have moved out by now.
my mom is nuts and in pain, my siblings won't help, my relationship has not talked to me in 5 months. I'm trying to reach the other end of this passage without falling.
Yes, i am finding out who my allies are, and aren't, when the shit hits the fan.
At least now I know what I am made of... and yes, I'm tired, and really pissed off, but I am proud of myself.
I'm just doing the best I can, and you know what? if what's his name leaves me because I'm taking care of my sick parent, then good riddance.
Now there will be room for some new fresh air in my life.
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