Hello all,
I am 30 years old. I just moved across the country for a new job about 5 months ago. My 77 y.o. father's kidneys failed shortly thereafter and began dialysis treatments. He lives by himself and clearly was having a hard time taking care of himself. Talking to him on the phone made me feel so awful, guilty and worried, in addition to having recently moved and starting a new job. So a couple months ago I offered to just have him move out here with me and thought "we'll figure something out."
My father has no pension or savings but collects a little bit in social security. All of this makes things a little difficult emotionally and financially for me. I feel very alone in this. Sometimes I feel good about it all and truly feel that everything will be ok and other times I feel like Im just lying to myself and that this was a mistake. Does anyone have any advice on how to cope emotionally with this?
You are truly a source of inspriation and courage. To be 30 years old and caring for your father is so self-sacrificial! I will be praying for God to give you wisdom and strength for the days ahead. While working at Focus on the Family, I came across a series of articles on their website that address the special challenges associated with caring for an aging loved one. I know you mentioned the emotional strain you are feeling..maybe talking to a counselor would help. Sometimes, it's just refreshing to talk to someone and know that what you're experiencing is normal. I'm sure that what you are doing is very close to God's heart. Blessings!
Be as clear as you can, with him, about what you need -- and that your needs, and his, may change in the future. Finally, see what you can do to hemp your dad find new friends where you live now, so he does not have to depend on you for absolutely everything. That will limit you in ways you do not want to be limited at this time in your life. Good luck and lots of love to you!
Everything will work out for you and your Dad. Good things will keep coming your way; just believe that and you will do fine. As above post says, you are not alone - we on this forum are all here to help. Sending you prayers and blessings - take care.
Just keep coming here and posting, asking questions, venting, and know that you are not alone in any feelings you have..we'll help, as there are (is?) many years of collective experiance with many different situations on this forum....
Wanting your dad to feel safe and helping him , nah, that can't be a mistake... as time goes on, you will learn many things and even if you have to place him nearby, you'll get help doing that too... so hang in there, you are not alone... hugs, prayers and angels to help you know love is never a mistake....