My dad passed away Monday. My routine for the past 4 years was a short visit to dad at least 5 days a week. Yesterday I took a mental health break and when I was driving home I glanced at the clock and thought I’m going to visit dad a bit late today. I realized then that I won’t have to do that anymore. How do I stop this thought process. I’m sure it’s part of the grieving process.
My dad died 23 years ago. I couldn't even go into that NH without bursting into tears for years.
Still, there are little things--questions I could have asked them about family and how to do things-- that will always come up, although less and less as we learn other coping mechanisms. That's why it takes time.
I always got my dad a big peppermint stick for Xmas. Now, when I see them in the store, instead of crying, I buy one. When I see an older gentleman alone, I ask him if he would like to have it in honor of my dad.
God bless you in your time of grief, and give you faith for your future.
You said so well how I fell at 8 months out. Time.... I hope so.
Thank you
What I began doing, and found it very helpful, was to record my "conversations" that I might have had by journaling. So instead of calling and discussing something, I type it on my computer.
Thus far it's been easier to type it, but I'm thinking that at some point I'll print it out and save it in a lovely journal decorated with photos and/or mementos relating to the various thoughts I've cherished.
We used to frequently stop for a Dairy Queen after medical appointments. I might glue on the medical appointment card, and add a photo of a DQ blizzard.
When it really helps is when the loneliness becomes overwhelming, or when I have to research a question that I could have asked him and gotten an answer from someone with experience in so many aspects of life.
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