I am sorry I have not responded to my other posts... I got the call today. The one that everyone dreads. It seems mom had taken a turn for the worse with her pneumonia. Plus she keeps having these little TIAs/CVAs and her pulse ox is down in the low 80s. I have consulted with her POA and we are all in agreement. The docs had her on a CPAP trying to force air into her lungs. We have taken her off of it. She is on oxygen and is getting Ativan every 4 hours. She is resting peacefully. She had been getting very aggitated and mumbling loudly. She is way worse then she was before when round one of this happened. I got here around 1500 today and it is now 0100. I will be here in this chair until the end. I have said my goodbyes. I have excused her from all wrong doings and told her she is forgiven. I have even gone so far as to tell her she has done the best she could to raise me and that I am being well taken care of by my wonderful husband. I am safe, I have my own home and one of the best husbands a wife could want. I had to pull him away from his Army unit today as he was in drill. So he showed up here in full uniform in order to be with me. I sent him home to get some rest since he had been up since 0400 the morning before. I asked the nurses what to expect or at least what the possibilities were as far as physical things that would happen to mom when she died. They filled me in. My question to everyone, what did you witness? How did you handle it? Was there anything special you did or said to the person whom was dying?
I am so sorry that you have gone through so much. I hope you have an opportunity to rest very soon. I know you have to be exhausted. Thanks for all of your kindness and thoughtfulness, even through you own difficulties.
My father had a brain tumor so was not conscious the last few days. He was in a wonderful residential hospice facility. The nurses and Dr.s there told us to let him rest peacefully the last few days and try not to interrupt his "journey" as long as he was peaceful and comfortable. They told us that as long as the person seemed comfortable it was better not to disturb them as sometimes you "bring them back" and prolong their pain and stay here on earth. They told us about the mottling of the legs that occurs right before death. We had several false alarms with the mottling and extreme breathing coming and going for about three days before he passed.
They told us that sometimes it appeared death was eminent and then the patient would continue for another few days, other time it would come without warning. Do they have a cot for you so that you can try to rest?
Will have you in my thoughts and prayers.